Is there hope for us after the break up?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-23-2007
Is there hope for us after the break up?
2
Sat, 11-24-2007 - 4:20pm

Hi Village -


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Sun, 11-25-2007 - 10:11am

No. There isn't any long-term hope for you two.

Let's look at what you think getting back together entails:
-Kissing
-Making changes in your own life to fit him back in
-Proving you'll make the effort

All of those are really erroneous. For starters, it's not YOU who needs to change. It's not even necessarily HIM who needs to change either, but you are absolutely wrong if you think that this is an issue of you putting in effort to the relationship. That's not going to do anything. In order for this relationship to work then you both have to be different people and have different relationships with your families. Is having a more distant connection to your family really worth your first boyfriend who doesn't even fit you? I'll let you in on a secret. We ALL thought that our first boyfriend was "the one". We all had dreams of marriage to him. Then we got over it and got smarter.

Keep your distance from this guy. The right one for you will fit without you having to feel like you need to change yourself in order for things to work. He's not the right one, move on.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Sun, 11-25-2007 - 2:39pm

Welcome to the board prepsterchic,


I'd encourage you to really look at your values and expectations, because he's not even on the same page as you.