tired of trying

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2008
tired of trying
3
Thu, 03-27-2008 - 2:06pm

My b/f says he's into PDA, he would but he wont hold my hand let me feed him (i.e...give him a french fry,) saying it embarrasses him. we got into fights because he would walk 10 feet ahead of me when we're walking together often forgetting im there but getting mad if another guy talks to me. we spoke about it and now he actually walks next to me lol

we have a long distance relationship because of school about 2hours apart, we only see each other every other weekend because we're both working... so i bought a webcam and he wont ask me to see it, or talk dirty to me on the phone and im the one that has to initiate every dirty convo we have...im tired of trying to get his attention, sometimes it feels like he's interested in everything else but me...so im beginning to feel unwanted and unattractive even though he keeps trying to reassure me that "im the hottest girl he's ever met",..i find it hard to believe because actions speak louder than words and he's not showing me that. we're planning to move in together after im finished with school, but im beginning to question that decision

I dont think he's cheating because he lives with his family (mom, dad, sisters), and i have a very close relationship with them and his mom is not the kind of woman that would stand by and watch him do that to me.

What's his problem?? Or is it me?? cause im really tired of trying...i spoke to him about it, everything i wrote about, things change for a min then goes right back to the way they were....What do i do now??

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Thu, 03-27-2008 - 2:18pm

Welcome to the board delescia45 (Is your username from

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Fri, 03-28-2008 - 5:58pm

Welcome to the board delescia45,


Long distance relationships are hard. Was he this way before you became relationship became a long distance one?


I agree with Carrie that he might be worried about the talking dirty on the phone because someone might overhear.

Avatar for drshoshanna
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 03-28-2008 - 7:43pm

If your boyfriend doesn't respond to you in the way that you need to feel loved, wanted and appreciated, then it may be that he simply isn't the one for you. It does sound as though he has difficulty with intimacy. He may be unaware of it, and certainly he is not aware of what his reactions do to you. Ultimately, you have to be true to yourself and your feelings. If you don't feel wanted or desired, if he is not open to that kind of interaction, then it sounds as though this is not a healthy relationship for you.


Best wishes,