Too late to save

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-22-2004
Too late to save
1
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 10:58am
After dating a guy for 3 weeks, he found out he was being relocated by his

job. We spent a great amount of time together during those 3 weeks. When

he told me he was leaving I decided to break it off. He said I was silly

for just saying forget it and that we could continue talking to each other

via phone and getting to know one another. But he didn't want to commit to a

relationship. He felt that would be unfair to him and to me. I didn't want

it to become an "I'll call when I come in town type deal", so I said I

wasn't interested. I called him back, and we began spending alot of time

together again, until he left. He went on many business trips during this

period and he would always call me and do things that I really didn't

expect. Now he has moved, but will be back soon temporarily and I'm not

hearing from him like I used to. I'm not sure if I should just let him go

and not call anymore or what. Soon as I try to forget him, he does

something that gives me hope. I know he won't commit at this point, so do I stop calling him?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-26-2004
Mon, 04-26-2004 - 1:41pm
This relationship seems too new to have such problems already. He has told you he can't do a committment right now, and that's actually a pretty nice thing of him to do. He's only known you a short time, and he will be away a lot of the time. He doesn't want to lead you on. You have to decide if something casual is alright with you. He didn't say he never wants to committ, he just wants more time to get to know you. But you seem to want something different than he does, you want something more serious. He was being honest with you when he said he can't give you that now. If I were you, I would let it go before getting too attached and it will become much harder. Find someone that wants the same things you do. And who knows, if he comes back to town and is ready to start something more serious with you, then you can give it a chance. But it will never work as long as you two want different things. Best of luck!!!!!