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|Tue, 01-07-2014 - 2:26pm|
Im 32 & my bf & I have been dating since May. Hes 30. About 3 months into our relationship, something felt off for me & he was acting different. So I did something I know Im not supposed to do: I went through his phone. What I found in it was shocking, appauling & disgusting. And heartbreaking. He had been talking to a few girls that were his "friends" and these conversations were more than friendly in nature. I also found out that he was viewing & had responded to personal listings on craigslist. His email to the one girl was: what is it you are looking for? His txt messages commented about what sleezy motel they were going to meet at. When I confronted him about his, of course his first response was that I invaded his privacy so he was pissed about that. Then when I asked him why he would do such things if he did indeed love me, his response was I dont know. He said that the txt messages to his friends were harmless & they were never meant to be taken seriously & thats just how he talks to these girls. He said that at that point, we had hit a rocky patch & he was not feeling happy in our relationship. So needless to say, I continued dating him with the understanding that we would communicate better toward eachother about what makes us unhappy & he swore he wouldn't do it again. Well this past wkend again I had that sinking feeling so I checked his phone again. This time I found he was messaging an "old friend" on facebook messenger. The part of the conversation I could read (cause some was deleted) was him calling her sexy & commenting on her large DD breasts & how her nipples were going to be hard because of the cold weather. I flipped! Again when confronted he was upset about my invasion of his privacy & his response again was I don't know why I did it. Its not like Im out screwing other people. Im so hurt & confused. This has happened twice & although he said he realizes what he did was wrong, he still thinks Im over reacting & I have a feeling he will continue these conversations with these women. He says that hes just a flirt & pervert & the comments are not meant to go any further. I have been reading a lot about sexting & seems thats what he is doing & I know that he loves women's attention. Our sex life is good, having sex 3+ times per wk & its not usually boring. So Im not sure what is going on with him & thru his head.