Unsatisfied marriage bed still love
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Unsatisfied marriage bed still love
| Fri, 01-30-2004 - 1:06pm |
I have been with the same man for 30 years, for at least the last 12, I began to realize that our sexual needs were very different. We have tried to work on this (without therapy) but we just can't see eye to eye. I have reached the point after this many years of dissappointing sex, that I had rather have my teeth drilled than have sex with him. He can't understand why I don't respond. I now realize that I am no longer physically attracted to him, although i still love him as a person and father of my children. In the mean time I feel that I am on the verge of propositioning someone, anyone else. Do you chuck a long marriage? Do you forget about ever having good sex? Don't know.

i agree with zurah. a satisfying sexual relationship is important in a marriage and there are many ways to get there if you are BOTH willing to make the effort.
If you tried to work on this without therapy, and have not succeeded - then the next obvious step would be therapy. since i don't know the nature of your problem it would be impossible to tell you where to go. is it something hormonal? physical? emotional? etc
sometimes when couples go thru difficult times in bed, therapists recommend to "forget" about having sex for a while, and to try and connect on other levels. dating, dressing up for each other, buying gifts, going away to a romantic place for a weekend, meeting at a bar, etc .
would your husband agree to therapy?
James
janderson_ny@yahoo.com
CL Ask A Guy
Propositioning anyone else is not the answer, though it is understandable that you feel frustrated after all these years and hungry for a good sexual relationship. I suggest instead that you and your husband seek couple (and perhaps sex therapy) together. Let him know how serious this problem
It's A New Day With Dr Shoshanna - Wed. 2-3 EST.
Well, quite frankly the fact that you can't care for yourself in the way that he cares for you is not a reason to cheat on him.
James
janderson_ny@yahoo.com
CL Ask A Guy