Used or Confused?
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Used or Confused?
| Thu, 02-12-2004 - 7:13pm |
There's this guy that I've been flirting with for the past few weeks. Well, last Sunday we finally went out and had a really great time except when he brought up the fact several times that he's dating other people. I got the hint when he told me who it was and where they went. Well, the other day I heard that they're going to prom together, even after he told me he wanted to go with me...hello?! He told a bunch of people he really likes us both, and that he can't decide who he wants to be with. What am I?!
I got really mad at him after all this happened and did not make an effort AT ALL, as opposed to before, to start any kind of conversation with him. He kind of pouted for a while, but now he's trying to eat me up again! I mean heavy on the flirting and compliments!
I really like this guy, and I can't help but flirt back now when he flirts with me. But I don't want to lead myself on. Is he just using me or is he really confused about who he likes? If the latter, how can I convince him I really care about him?
I got really mad at him after all this happened and did not make an effort AT ALL, as opposed to before, to start any kind of conversation with him. He kind of pouted for a while, but now he's trying to eat me up again! I mean heavy on the flirting and compliments!
I really like this guy, and I can't help but flirt back now when he flirts with me. But I don't want to lead myself on. Is he just using me or is he really confused about who he likes? If the latter, how can I convince him I really care about him?

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Erin
quickblade14@hotmail.com
Decide if you want to continue to date this guy who dates others or leave if you can't handle that.
'Is he just using me or is he really confused about who he likes?'
How is hw using you if he dates you and tells you that he dates others too? He is not confused. He knows what he wants. It is not about choosing one girl over the other and then being faithful. It is about not wanting to be tied down to one.
'If the latter, how can I convince him I really care about him?'
You convincing him that you care about him is a separate issue from the two of you wanting different things. He can know that you care and also continue to date others.
This guy is immature and unreliable. He may be fun to flirt with, but if I were you i'd find someone else to flirt with and date. Or, flirt with him *and* someone else. Use him as he is using you ;-)
Flattery and compliements makes us feel good, unless we are strong enough to recognize it as just flirtation, like feeling your way around people and situations. Flattery can get you more informations, more openness, even affection and attention, but it doesn't mean it's always 100% real nor does it mean that it will be continuous.
He may like you both, he may be unsure of his feelings for either of you, but he's young and he's trying to figure it out. So, you have to decide what you want in your life. Someone that flirts with you, but takes another girl to the prom?
Defining your own boundaries for yourself, your behavior and conduct is a way to project your self-worth. Your worth isn't based on whether or not he likes you, flirts with you, takes you to the prom (or someone else) it's based on how you feel about yourself. Personally, I wouldn't try to prove anything to him. He's made a decision about the prom and you don't want to be seen as the person that tries to break them up.
Anyway, I know you are confused and hurt by his behavior, but I hope this helps some.
Carrie
If you want a boyfriend look elsewhere.
Carrie
There are 3 types of kisses. First, there's the ever-so-polite "peach" kiss. Now say it. "peach!" Second, there's the one that most women like, the "prune" kiss. Now say it. "prunnnnne!" Finally, there's the one that guys like. Are you ready for this? You have to say it with gusto now! "ALPHALPHA!"
lol...ok I'm a dork. But I thought it was cute :)
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