Waiting for engagement
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|Sun, 01-19-2014 - 4:56am|
I have a lovely and caring partner of 1 year. Last summer we started talking about engagement and in autumn we searched, agreed on and booked our wedding date and location. There's just one step we skipped - engagement. We thought reserving the location that we both fell in love with, can't wait so we booked It. We agreed that The wedding arrangmenets are for me to lead, and the engagement is on him. It has been months since then, we went to a couple of jewleries but haven't found the ring yet (or it was way too expensive!). I feel like he's not so fired up about it and I'm losing my patience in trying to understand him and his lack of organization. For example, I showed him one ring online that I would really like to see, the shop is in our city but he hasn't made an appointment (and it's been 2 months since).
Whenever I gently remind him (even though I feel like I pressure him when I do that!), it feels like we're not experiencing this whole engagement thing positively. The last that happened was we agreed to go see that ring but that day we had other things to do. While he could have said that is a priority and we should definitely do that (and easily cut other things out), he instead remembered a few times that we need to go see that new laptop I'm plannign to buy. When I told him that remembering to find or schedule time to go buy the laptop seems to cross his mind much faster than the ring, he says it's not true that this is an indication of anything. I know he loves me but I'm running out of ideas to understand why he doesn't act on it. It takes a lot of asking and probing before he mentions that he's worried about the cost and that he can't get me the thing I might like the most. I know this isn't about him getting cold feet but I also can't help feel hurt when he's first thinking about how much it will cost.
What should I do?