want to meet man,but what do i do

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2003
want to meet man,but what do i do
10
Wed, 08-11-2004 - 1:15am
i'm 50 & have had 2 failed marriages, over possessive, jealous, lyiers - i want to meet someone, but not to marry just someone to have a good time with. the problem is i'm a loner i keep to myself & have a real problem getting out there. when i do, it seems like i blend into the woodwork. it's hard for me to make friends (male or female) so any pointers out there.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2004
Wed, 08-11-2004 - 2:37am
Hi there,

Just because your 50 and had 2 failed marriages, does not mean that you cannot find a companion. However, being a loner is not a bad thing; because I am as well. But you do have to get out in order to meet people. I recommend going to places you like to go, to meet new people. I do not have many friends and sometimes I find it hard to make new ones, because I am not like everyone else and have different views on (what a good time is). Most people out there do everything, everyone else does; just to fit in. I find that I meet people, just by striking up a conversation anywhere I might be at the time; whether its the grocery store, book store, park....etc. Just try being more friendlier. You should also bring yourself out of the woodwork by, taking more time with your appearance; by maybee changing something in your style, that will give you a feeling of a new you! I also think that your 2 ex-marriages, left you feeling down and insecure; because you stated "failed marriages" Just because your marriages didn't work out, does not mean that all is lost. Sometimes people go through many relationships, before they find the right one. I strongly believe that all of us have that one right person out there, that is meant for us. Get out of your slump and start doing things that make you feel better about yourself. Start living! Keep your head up and don't search for a man. When you start searching, you start to loose focus on yourself. Just find and do things that make you happy and the right man will just pop up before you know it. Good luck to you and I hope that my opinion has helped.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Wed, 08-11-2004 - 2:43pm
Make a list of things you would want to try - kick boxing, rock climbing, parasailing, take a cooking class, yoga, reading/book group, check out www.craigslist.org for ideas.

Also, if there is a local ToastMasters in your area really helps with learning to talk in public, meeting people and being comfortable. Or take a college communications class.


Carrie

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
Wed, 08-11-2004 - 3:00pm
Go to volunteermatch.org or your local volunteer center and get out and do something for your community. Find something that you are passionate about and chances are you will meet people with whom you have something in common. Try match.com to find dates with men that you have something in common with. Take classes. Join a gym or local pool.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2003
Fri, 08-13-2004 - 10:33pm
you make a lot of sense. i've made some changes to my appearance & that's uplifting. i'm also like you i have a real problem making friends & keeping in touch w/ them. i don't really have any friends that are a good influence, so i dropped them. so that leaves me w/ the dilemna - friends to go out w/ to have some fun & meet new people. i'll keep what u said in mind though.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2003
Fri, 08-13-2004 - 10:38pm
i'm going to check out the website. unfortunately i can't afford to take any classes now - believe - i would love to do that. what is toastmasters???
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2003
Fri, 08-13-2004 - 10:41pm
thx i'm going to check into the volunteer website - i love gardening & crafts - so maybe u'r right & i'll meet someone that way
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2003
Fri, 08-13-2004 - 10:56pm
we have a lot in common - the friends i had were either mutual "friends" from relationships - they don't like taking sides & being friendly & then i had friends that were not good influences - so i dropped them - so that leaves me alone - i'm going to try to get out more & find places to go that interest as long as there isn't much $ involved - i have always gotten along w/ people i work w/ but never take it any further - maybe i should try
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2003
Fri, 08-13-2004 - 10:58pm
i'm going to check out the website you suggested, but what is toastmasters???
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-08-2003
Fri, 08-13-2004 - 11:01pm
i think u have a great idea, volunteering & i'm going to check out the website u gave me. i love gardening & crafts so those are things i could look into as long as it doesn't cost a lot of $.

thx
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Sat, 08-14-2004 - 1:19pm


Carrie