Was i so wrong ?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2012
Was i so wrong ?
22
Wed, 11-07-2012 - 4:17am

<p>Hi all, i have a boyfriend who lives 1/4 mile away and although he does not like to stay at mine he does as so do i stay at his , He presently does not work and he lives on his own . I work full time have a son at college and a aging poorly dog , but i make the effort to go to his to stay over too.&nbsp;</p><p>Last eve after packing dog bed, food , my clothes and meds for my dog ..getting her into car (i carry step around ) i arrived and got settled ..Having a glass of wine i noticed my dog did not look too good ..i said to him look at her what do you think of her breathing ?? He immediately jumped up out of his seat and said"I can see im in the bleeding way here " and marched off upstairs ! so not knowing what to do i packed my dogs things up and my own ...got her into the car and came home ..i was not at his a hr b4 this happened ..i felt so let down by his behaviour ..did i do right ,,iv not phoned or text nor he me either , comments would be appreciated thank you x</p>

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2012
Thu, 11-15-2012 - 2:01pm

Thank you all so much for your input x : ) 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-11-2011
Thu, 11-15-2012 - 1:26pm
thank god you have a way out early without any real irreversible damage... screw him wherever he is do not phone him do not text him do not reach out to him we all here wish you the best of luck
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2012
Tue, 11-13-2012 - 6:48pm
Thank you x
Community Leader
Registered: 10-22-2001
Tue, 11-13-2012 - 10:48am

~hugs~

I don't think so.

He was quite rude I thought.

ALL you asked him was a simple question, a bit of feed-back.

You carted your dog, yourself over to his place for HIS  benefit and then he does that!

So glad you left.

I had a b/f like that jealous and it was my kids and our cats.

Silly.

He had kids they had pets but it was too one-sided.

Sounds way too critical of you your son your home etc.

I would "Dump" him in a New York minute.

You deserve better.

Nightangel
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2012
Sat, 11-10-2012 - 8:52pm
P.s Came !
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2012
Sat, 11-10-2012 - 8:48pm
Think your out numbered here !! and also if i did not go over i would still be wrong as to be putting a dog first ... as i do not do at all as you insinuate, The fact being she has just been through a very rough patch and im trying to keep him (partner) happy as he wont stay at mine as he says my sofa is uncomfy,bed too hard , house too small .too noisy no dvd , tv channels rubbish ,too cold oh i could go on & on .. so you see although you think my dog comes first i cant win i try very hard in pleasing him and only asked a simple question! as fireworks were going off and if left at home alone she ripped carpets up last yr ...Maybe if i got a tent and camped between the two !!!!!! oh and no nursing was mentioned was it ???
Avatar for xxxs
Community Leader
Registered: 01-25-2010
In reply to: xxxs
Sat, 11-10-2012 - 2:19pm

  There is more to this.  I can see the over involvement in a pet.  I can't blame him for feeling put out.  You cam over to his house to do what nurse your dog?  Many dog owners do this as if the person they are visiting is almost in the way.  Men and women do this.  No wonder why he is pissed.  If your dog is sick then stay home.  He is not going to have the feelings that you do.  Nor should you expect him to.  No one likes being in 2nd place.  If the shoe was on the other foot you would be complaining about his over involvement in his pet too.

dragowoman

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-06-2006
Sat, 11-10-2012 - 2:12pm
Where did she say he doesn't like her son? He doesn't like her dog and behaved abominably when she expressed very natural concern for her pet's wellbeing, but I don't see anything about his not liking her son.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-06-2006
Sat, 11-10-2012 - 2:09pm

I think you have seen his real character, such as it is.  You deserve better than him.  And your dog is really lucky to have you to care for her; you are clearly an excellent, loving caretaker.  You were not wrong.  He's a selfish, insensitive jerk and very, very wrong to react as he did.  Stay strong and do not give in even if he apologizes.  You deserve to have a companion who respects you and what is important to you.  Don't settle for another jerk.  You will find someone who values you and respects your concern for your pet.  Good luck to you. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2012
Sat, 11-10-2012 - 9:12am

Thank you ,and yes i'm begining to think that way now -at first i was upset ..but as days have gone by i'm thinking stronger and angry now to the fact i'v let him get this far in treating me in this manner.I also have researched and do think he has a passive agressive behaviour problem and im gathering up courage now as not to be around to endure it anymore , thank you for your reply and for caring in giving your time.  

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