What Can I Do?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2005
What Can I Do?
3
Sun, 11-04-2007 - 8:56pm

My husband and I have been married for 19 months, and we have two daughters who are 5 (from his first marriage) and 4.5 weeks old.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
Sun, 11-04-2007 - 9:26pm

I could make a few guesses at what's going on....but without being inside his head and body, the guesses

Dress Up Games, Doll Makers and Cartoon Dolls @ The Doll Palace
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Mon, 11-05-2007 - 12:36am

Welcome to the board southernashleyr,


I agree with iv_aisha about the list of things that could be wrong with your husband.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-13-2007
Mon, 11-05-2007 - 3:37pm

There is nothing childish about wanting to have sex with your husband. You do not need psychological help due to the fact you want to have sex with your husband. In fact, I'd say the opposite is true. He needs to find out what is going on with him physically/psychologically that's causing him to not want to have sex with his wife and if he refuses to seek that help, I'd begin to seriously consider my options...


Yes, marital problems can cause problems in the bedroom, however the opposite is equally as true. Problems in the bedroom can poison the entire marriage, as well. It's time he take responsibility, realize that sex is truly important in a marriage, and seek a solution to the problem before he finds himself with yet another failed marriage.


Another good board you may want to check out is the Mismatched Libidos forum here on ivillage. There, you can gain insight from both sides of the equation and helpful advice from others who have been there =) One of the posters on that forum summed it up so eloquently with these two excerpts:


"When one first finds themselves in the Land of a Thousand Excuses for Not Having Sex, we often think ourselves shallow for contemplating leaving an otherwise perfectly good relationship for something as silly as sex. Sex can be small and silly like a very small pebble in your shoe. Leave it in long enough, and it can cripple an entire body. Putting it deeper into your shoe will not solve the problem any more than deepening your committment to this nice fellow will lessen your pain. The sexlessness has a way of taking over the whole relationship and contaminating everything about it. So you have a painful thing to go through. Quick break or the slow bend?"


"I totally get it, having a lovely roommate but feeling physically worthless and undesirable."- T-man


Edit: Typo.




Edited 11/5/2007 3:43 pm ET by intj