what to do? =/

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2003
what to do? =/
4
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 9:18pm
me and my boyfriend have been going out for 2 years+ and he is very committed to me. We always talk about the future and us getting married and everything and i know he means it. But here's the problem...he doesn't like my parents so we never spend any time at my parents house and we are always at his. My parents may not be the best or even as good as his but they do like him and they are nice to him, they are just protective of their "little girl" especially my dad. I just don't know what to do. My boyfriend loves me and i love him i just wish that he would accept my parents and try to get along with and be with them more. I've tried the whole talking thing and now im just out of ideas....help?
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2003
Tue, 09-14-2004 - 8:28am

Is there a reason why they dont care for him?, or just because its "their daughters BF, and no one is ever good enough for you?" If the latter is true, then you need to sit down at talk to them about it. Here them out, they may have a very valid reason for their feelings. I would inform them that you are a big girl and can make your own decisions. Ultimaley, you are the one that has to date him and will continue to do so, but would like there cooperation and approval.


They may or may not come around and thats up to you what you want to do....You

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 09-14-2004 - 11:01am
charmedfairy...

Pianoguy realizes that your b/f is a bit stubborn when it comes to your parents...but like it or not...if the 2 of you ended up having a kiddoe or two together, YOUR PARENTS have just as many rights to see 'em as HIS DOES. What type of an impression would any children have if they were denied one set over another? Their 'Dad's crappy behavior' would be passed along....and this is unacceptible!

Your b/f sounds like a control freak and a bit of a snob! Frankly, HIS attitude STINKS! Comparing your parents to his is dangerous...and VERY UNFAIR! Don't make excuses for your Mom and Dad...nor disrespect them in any way...because you MIGHT have to turn to them in a crisis!

Honestly...if your b/f is so dumb that he can't realize that it's only through THEM that YOU CAME ALONG...he needs a "reality check!!"

Pianoguy (who wishes his parents were still here and he could THANK THEM for their love and their wisdom)

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Tue, 09-14-2004 - 5:49pm
How sad that he's unwilling to make the effort. When people are in a relationship there are interpersonal relationships with other people - family and friends. Those relationship don't go away when you are in love or married.

My best advice, make time with your family, make plans, invite him along and if he won't go, go without him.


Carrie

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2003
Wed, 09-15-2004 - 8:37am
thank you all for your advice. it really did help me put things in perspective and now i know a little bit more on what's the next step i need to take. I'm glad i just wasn't being unreasonable about it all. Thank you again =)