I'm 25 years old and broke up with my boyfriend about four months ago. We were together for almost 2 years. The short and sweet version is that he and I had a great time together, lots of chemistry, and he's truly a wonderful person. But he did have a lot of immature qualities (he's a few years older than me and has no real career or ambitions, a sort of refusal to become an adult, etc.) that made me think I couldn't see a future with him. So, since we broke up I have felt confident that I made the right decision, because I was never sure that he was the one. We recently started hanging out again as friends, and we have such a great time together that it's really left me feeling conflicted about whether or not I'm meant to be with him. I thought that pretty much the whole time we were together that my gut was saying that he wasn't the one, and now I'm not sure what my gut is saying. Last night I had one of the most disturbing dreams I can ever remember having. I dreamed that I was attending his wedding, and it absolutely broke my heart to see him so happy with his new bride. I woke up in the middle of the night and I was actually shaking, it disturbed me so much. This is the strangest thing because in real life he has had a hard time getting over me and I've hoped many times for him to meet someone else, and I honestly didn't think it would bother me. He's such a terrific person and was such a great boyfriend that I truly just want him to be happy. And there he was in my dream, happy, just as I want him to be, and it felt like a knife through the heart. I was just not prepared for how terrible it made me feel. Is this a sign that we should get back together? Or a sign that I did the right thing by listening to my gut, and that he will find happiness and so I shouldn't worry so much about him? I'm so confused and upset by it.
I've received advice from friends that when someone is "the one," you just know it, and it shouldn't be so difficult to decide and rationalize. I feel like I keep going back and forth about whether or not we should be together. At the same time, what does it say that I can't just fully get over it? I just can't imagine having that kind of compability with anyone else, and it makes me sad to even think about it. I miss him so much. Needless to say, I'm totally confused.
Any thoughts that anyone has would be EXTREMELY helpful. Thank you so much. By the way, at the end of the dream, the Golden Girls came in bringing plates of food. I'm not even trying to analyze that piece of it...:)