What Is He Thinking??
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| Fri, 04-09-2004 - 1:23am |
I am new to this message board, so here goes.
About 2 months ago I asked this guy out. While we were out, everything seemed to be going really well. When the night ended he asked me if I had plans the following day and unfortunately I did have plans. After that night, he never called me. I called him about a week later and he was happy to hear from me and we went out again and everything seemed to go well. The same thing happened agian, he never called after that night so I called him a week later and we went out again. We have gone out about 6 or 7 times and I have met alot of his friends already and he gives me signs that he is interested but he never picks up the phone to call me. I have always been the one to call. I am so confused because he shows that he likes me but then he never calls.
I finally got fed up with him not calling so I did what I thought would make me feel better. I called him up and was straight up with him. I told him that I wasn't into playing games and that I like spending time with him. He was really nice with his response and was very accomadating to my questions. His response to that was, he has alot on his plate right now with work and stuff. And that he is not one to plan things and that he just goes with the flow. (what does he mean by that)... He asked me if I was mad and I said no and I left the conversation at that if he wanted to go out to call me and he hasn't. It's been about 2 weeks now. I don't know what to do... I like this guy and we have alot in common and I can see us having alot of fun together.
Did I do the right thing by being honest with him??? Should I call him or just let this one go???
Thanks.

You deserve more - don't settle for less.
Toni
And basically, eh "goes with the flow"....this guy has lots of friends, interests, irons in the fire...the phone is ringing constantly with offers and opportunities - and whichever one suits his interests or needs at the moment he goes....he doesn't "plan".
He collects all the offers, reviews them like a bank statement and then goes with the one that best suits his needs and desires at the moment.
In short, he's invested in himself and enjoying his life and including others in it...but he's not at this oint interested in investing himself in another person's life in more than just an external and superficial capacity.
Erin
quickblade14@hotmail.com
It's hard to say what's really going-on with your situation, however. It may be really hard to get him to open-up. I don't think he's just giving you the run-around, necessarily. When he says he "goes with the flow" he may mean he just does whatever comes-up. He maybe does have too much on his plate right now to plan much, but maybe he doesn't feel comfortable explaining it. It sounds to me like he likes you, but maybe he just doesn't have the time nor energy to begin a serious relationship right now. Probably if you could get him to confide in you, rather than just have fun, your relationship would deepen. Best wishes.