what if she is a great person

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2004
what if she is a great person
3
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 10:19am
Hey,

what is a man to do if he is involved with someone who has great personality and a wonderful loving heart.

However, I am not attracted to her physically.

I know that the physical is not everything, but it does play a part especially for a man.

I love her with all my heart, but it is a real struggle to be intimate with her.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 10:35am
So, you admire and respect her as a person. YOu think the qualities and values that she has are admirable...and you love the consequences of her actions in your life...but you don't find her physically attractive?

Stop trying to "sleep with a friend"....break up, and after awhile the platonic friendship will likely resume.

Erin

quickblade14@hotmail.com

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2003
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 10:51am
You accept the fact that this isn't the right woman for you. Physical chemistry is just as important as being compatible in all other areas. Find someone who is completely what you want and need, not just partially (it's worth holding out for, believe me).
Avatar for drshoshanna
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 04-09-2004 - 11:47am

It sounds as though this is a great friendship - not a romantic relationship. It's good to call a thing what it is and not force it to be something it isn't. A good friend is a treasure. A romantic, primary relationship is a treasure as well - but the two are quite different. Don't force yourself to be physical if the energy is not there. It's not healthy or basically kind to either of you.


All good wishes.