When they plant themselves

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2007
When they plant themselves
5
Sun, 08-19-2007 - 2:15am

What are you suppose to do when you are out, festival, party, wedding, bar,... whatever, and a guy that you are NOT interested in decides to plant himself with you for the rest of the night? You dance with him ONE time and he follows you to your table, and stays for the entire time that you're there!!!

You can't get him to leave your table, next-door chair, ect.?? And moving tables doesn't work!!! Then the one you WANT to meet can't come up to you because of "planting guy".

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Sun, 08-19-2007 - 8:55am

"Hey, sorry to cut this short but I'm going to go find some of my friends to hang out with. It was nice to meet you though."

Just be direct.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2006
Sun, 08-19-2007 - 11:55am
Say 'it was nice meeting you. I have to go (to the restroom now) (make a phone call outside) (talk to my friend).' Then go and when you come out go sit with whomever you want.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-14-2007
Sun, 08-19-2007 - 7:33pm

But..... what if I'm just there with one girlfriend? I have nowhere to go! I'm stuck.
Do I just ignore him? (which I've tired the "turn-away" thing) Or do I just say, "Hey, it was nice dancing with you (once) and Thanks for the drink, but,,,, uh,,,, go away!"

Geez, what do I do? And not be rude! Don't you think that the guy would be rude doing that? I would NEVER plant myself at a guys table if he asked me to dance, or bought me a drink. Oh wait...... I'd be labeled as the psycho! ha ha ha

I've said before, (years!!!! ago!!!) "Look, I didn't ask you to plant yourself next to me, okay?" How direct can I be and not hurt their feelings? And they still never leave.

This happened to me 2 Thursday's ago, and I just didn't know what to do so I went home.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2006
Sun, 08-19-2007 - 11:25pm

'But..... what if I'm just there with one girlfriend? '

Go to the bathroom with or without her. I don't understand. What was your girlfriend doing at the time? You can still excuse yourself for whatever reason and come back inside later. And don't let him buy you a drink.

After the first dance walk away to another side of the bar from where you were seated or pull out your cell phone like you are receiving a call and go outside.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Mon, 08-20-2007 - 8:44am
Yup. You can walk away somewhere else without actually looking to find a friend to meet. Don't get hung up on being honest to these guys, if they don't take the hint at first they shouldn't have their feelings spared.