why did he change?
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why did he change?
| Mon, 08-09-2004 - 5:50pm |
Last Saturday I asked my bf of 2 years to stop calling me b/c I couldn't tolerate his bad behavior. Everyone knew him as a "gentleman" because of his nobel manners, his respectfulness, his kindness, and his caring for people. All these qualities made me fall for him 2 years ago & he hadn't been anything but kind & loving & respectful to me. We had our rough times & disagreements but not a single time did we yell at each other or disrespected one another. However all that changed 3 weeks ago. It feels like I don't know him anymore, he's been disrespecting me,yelling at me, making fun of me, not calling me, getting drunk & mistreating me for the past 3 weeks. To me it feels like I am having a bad dream! All his friends took notice of the situation, the ladies in our friends group asked me to leave him & the guys have no idea why their friend of 20 years has changed so dramatically. I tried everyday for 3 weeks to try to get through him to find out the source of the problem but he never talks. I feel so frustrated and confused as how can a person change so much. His jerky behavior has everyone stunned. After trying for 3 weeks, I asked him to stop calling me unless he changes his manners & become the man that he was before. Eventhough I know that I did the right thing, I feel extremely depressed and not loved. The fact that I never found out the reason of his behavior's change is really bothering me having me wonder whether he will ever return.
Has anyone ever been in a similar situation? Does anyone have any explanation?
Any thought or advise will be appreciated.
Has anyone ever been in a similar situation? Does anyone have any explanation?
Any thought or advise will be appreciated.

4 thoughts from Pianoguy:
1. Is your boyfriend having financial problems of any kind?
2. Is your boyfriend having problems at work?
3. Is your boyfriend on a type of medication (a.k.a. drugs) that might be affecting his head?
4. Is your boyfriend trying to break things off with you to pursue someone else?
These are all "possible reasons" for his irradic behavior? I hope he gets his act together before he loses YOU!
Pianoguy
1) No, he is a very wealthy man.
2)I am not sure whether he has problems at work. Yes his job is stressful but that has always been the case.
3)As far as drugs or medications, I am not sure about medications but every 2 months or so, occasionally with his friends he smokes a joint or two. Now your point makes me wonder whether he does drugs more often than what I know. His friends do not know that he does Cocaine too, I am the only person that knows about that. But again according to him, he does it on occasion. But I know that he has access to it 24/7.
4) I don't think that he is doing this to break things off w/me. I asked him numerous times whether he wants me to leave & everytime he answered that he loves me & never wants me to leave!
I am really lost and frustrated but your thoughts certainly helped.
TANX
Any incorrect combination of medication (cocaine plus some other drug) will throw anybody's balance off. Unfortunately, you might not get an honest answer about the stuff he's taking from him!
The worst part about being "hooked" on any medication...IS WITHDRAWING FROM IT!
And this applies to cocaine, barbituates...even aspirin! It's a false "comfort zone" that many of us can't give up!
Hopefully...YOU can convince him to see a specialist who will help him remove this problem from his daily routine?
My prayers are with you both....
Pianoguy