Why is he even considering this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-06-2004
Why is he even considering this?
6
Sat, 05-03-2008 - 5:12pm

My story is a little long,


My husband and I have been married for 3 years, we have always had a very "open" relationship.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-02-2007
Sat, 05-03-2008 - 7:35pm
Can he be picking a fight with you to justify getting together with your friend?
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-10-2007
Sat, 05-03-2008 - 8:46pm

Did you mention to him how he told you to do "whatever

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Sun, 05-04-2008 - 12:00am
Maybe he couldn't believe that you would actually want to take your top off in front of his brother.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Mon, 05-05-2008 - 1:13pm

Welcome to the board noni4200,


Look at things from your husband's point of view. He leaves to go to the bathroom. Leaving his wife, another girl, and his brother alone. He returns to find his wife and other girl who are both wet from being in the hot tub standing up (topless) with his wife messing with the bottoms of the other girl.


If he decides he wants to try things, I would refrain from activites like this when you are drunk and don't really remember things.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2006
Wed, 05-07-2008 - 1:41pm

Yeah but on the other hand, you usually fulfill all of his fantasies as far as other girls etc, so he has the nerve to complain about something like that?

Avatar for drshoshanna
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 05-07-2008 - 8:57pm

This is a very sad story. You play with fire when you get involved in sexual activities such as those you described. It's unfortunate that this happened. The only way I believe it could be healed would be if your husband were willing to go to a marriage counselor with you - and sit down and have some sessions with a professional who could help get your marriage back on track. I understand how rough this is for him as his brother was involved. But he should also realize that he bears some responsibility for this situation as he told the woman to take her top off, and his brother was there, so the door was opened for sexual behavior with all of you involved.


I don't know if your husband will cool down and be able to see the larger picture. Unless he is willing to get some help, and see things differently, there may not be a way to rescue this marriage. Perhaps you can get his brother to speak to him, since you and the brother are friends. Perhaps he'll listen if the brother reassures him that he did not see you, and if he urges his brother to forgive you. At least that might do something.


All good wishes,