Working this out maybe...

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2009
Working this out maybe...
3
Wed, 08-15-2012 - 12:22pm

So, my ex and i been through a lot mostly on mine side. I been going through a lot, family issues, myself issues, and in all this our relationship went on the back burner. I said some things to him about my daughter and him not careering for her and it wasn't true with everything going on i forgot what i said to him now i understand and see my mistakes. I couldn't handle anything anymore so i got my self to see a therapist.  He stopped talking to me for about 4 days because he gotten overwhelmed and he told me her cares for me and my daughter and don't want anything bad happen too us but don't think we have a future together anymore. I told him i was too overwhelmed and what i was doing in my life how i was helping my self. Told him that i see that i was wrong and that there was no apologies i could give to him to make up for it. But i did hope that we could start with a new clean slate when the time was right. I also said that i need sometime for myself. He responses back okay, what are you talking about?? Ok, just let me know. So, i guess i am thinking he willing maybe give us another shot? So maybe just as friends? i know i should be asking him this but is still a little bumpy, i don't want to make another mistake and i don't want to lose him anymore then i do. There just been a lot of miscommunication  and me trying to figure out myself and making mistakes in communication bc i didn't know any better. my family really messed up.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Wed, 08-15-2012 - 5:41pm

Jess, at present the focus should be on you and your therapy - not on getting back together with him.    Only time will tell if he's up for having another try, but it's also understandable if he doesn't want to. 

Friendship only will not work because you care for him as more than a friend.   Besides, his future girlfriends probably won't accept him hanging out with an ex.    There's a reason that very few people manage a friendship with a recent ex.    Let that idea go.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2009
Wed, 08-15-2012 - 6:32pm

I know i am trust me i am. but it so hard what we had was amazing and i am not trying to get that back but he was my sanity from everything and have him mad or upset with me just kills me. i didn't mean it all but it is what it is. But fous is on me. i was just wondering

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Wed, 08-15-2012 - 10:34pm

Jess, if what you had was amazing, it wouldn't have ended.   It certainly doesn't sound as if he'd describe it in such glowing terms.      I know I'm being blunt, but now is the time for being honest with yourself.