The Yo-Yo Connection

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-16-2004
The Yo-Yo Connection
Thu, 09-16-2004 - 4:43pm
After a lenghty yo-yo relationship of being friends then lovers then friends then lovers I was told that he just wasn't 'there' and wanted to be friends. Because of the repetitiveness of the situation I walked completely away and for 7 months we had no communication, clearly being just friends didn't come naturally for either of us! Now we've been talking on email for @ 5 weeks. He's admitted there's something there more than just friendship as he doesn't flirt or think of his other friends like he does me but that he's overly cautious about trying it again as it hasn't been right in the past, and openly admits he's protecting himself. Additionally, he's acknowledges I fill a physical need he's not been able to duplicate in other relationships. I'm older, something he's struggled with from day one. We've always had an excellent connection, many of our friends don't understand why we can't seem to get it together.

He actively flirts but has been honest that he's gone out with a couple of girls since I've been back in the picture~one before me that ended and now a new one but not serious yet, therefore the heavy flirting confuses me! He's not making any attempt to get closer at this point than just via email, which he always initiates. My question is this: with his admission that there's now something different do I just chill and keep being chat buddy to allow it to develop or do I bail because if it's not there, it's not there and never will be and why go on the yo-yo path again?


Side note: In the past I was guilty of overreacting to the point of asking where/what/how things are going and not being able to just relax and see where it goes. Also, I've made a personal commitment NOT to get physical until it becomes something warranting it.