oral sex...he won't go there

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-2011
oral sex...he won't go there
8
Mon, 04-18-2011 - 7:43pm

My ex-husband was the best at giving oral sex. New husband won't even go there. We've talked about it (as much as he will) and he said it just won't ever happen.

Every time we fool around my mouth will end up on his penis at some point. I don't want to be mean and deprive him, but what do I do? I've showered right before, I've suggested flavored lubricants, toys, etc. I don't think I can live the rest of my life without receiving oral sex. I'm actually considering having an affair.

Someone help please...

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2012
Re: oral sex...he won't go there
Wed, 08-08-2012 - 1:23pm
It may be a hangup from bad experiences, or religious, or he's just selfish. I, for one, love to go down on my SO and don't stop until she pries me from between her legs and we make love. I would do it even if it didn't lead to making love.
Try all the suggestions here, share your fluid, either openly or secretly.
Your and his tastes are different according to your diet and other things. Add a lot of sweet fruits and avoid pungent foods. Look it up on the net.
Maybe you could do that for a week or so, and ask him to try for you. Tell him how much it would mean to you and how you know you would love it. If he does, make a BIG deal of the emotions. I don't think you will have to fake it, just make the reactions BIGGER and let him know how much you enjoy it. Give him the best F**K**G of his life. That may give him the right idea.
All that failing, tell him you don't like the taste of his pecker and won't be sucking it anytime soon.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2006
Thu, 12-01-2011 - 11:40am
I have the same problem, I always give me DH oral sex before we have sex because I like making him feel good but he won't even go near me there. I had a son 8 1/2 years ago & he said he won't because he saw my son being born & looks at my vagina differently since seeing that, idk if that's true or just an excuse to not give me oral. I miss it so much too. I've looked into buying toys that will satisfy that need. But its not fair to me to go the rest of my life without being pleased orally. He has obviously gotten very lazy & gets pleasured by me orally. I often fantisize about receiving oral sex from someone who is wiling to please me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-07-2011
Wed, 06-22-2011 - 1:15pm

Agreed.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
Wed, 04-27-2011 - 8:15pm

Well, I can't say that no two women have the same smell and taste (though I'd love to participate in the research to find out!), but there is a HUGE variation from woman to woman (and to some extent, day-to-day for each woman).

How about "sneaking" a bit of juice from your vagina to some place his nose or mouth will likely be (nipples, neck)?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-18-2011
Wed, 04-27-2011 - 11:58am

there is nothing I won't try, and he knows that. I'm pretty adventurous and he is pretty vanilla. so the whole bartering thing is probably not going to happen. before we got married he kept hinting that it might happen someday. still nothing.

i've trimmed, groomed, shaved completely, waxed, plucked, you name it. I've shaved and showered and come to bed...nothing.

i know an affair won't fix anything. i'm just desperate. he won't talk about it. I've asked him point blank if it is the taste or texture or what he objects to and his answer is "yes" as in all of the above. what makes me mad is he doesn't even know what I taste like. am I wrong in assuming that all women are different?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Wed, 04-27-2011 - 4:16am

lickysplt summed it up pretty well.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
Sun, 04-24-2011 - 1:51pm

Ok, not very helpful, I suspect, but our motto is "lick it before you stick it".

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2006
Wed, 04-20-2011 - 10:47am

Did you know prior to getting married that he didn't like this? If you've tried talking to him about it and all he can say is it won't happen, then tell him he will not be getting anymore BJ's until he can give you a good answer as to what he doesn't like about it.



28999825.jpg picture by nhgal2006

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2010
Tue, 04-19-2011 - 11:51am

Keep talking to him.