abnormal fantasy??

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2004
abnormal fantasy??
4
Wed, 07-21-2004 - 3:56pm
Im curious to see if Im alone on this type of fantasy of mine and Id really like to get some kind of idea of why it does it for me. For some reason my most reaccuring fantasy for masterbation is imagining my fiance with other women. They will be doing the most xxx activities you could think of, and, of course, I imagine him having the time of his life in complete ecstacy. Now...in real life I would NEVER want to see this! Im actually, unfortunetely, a pretty jealous person when it comes to my man being attracted by other women. I always manage to make the girl so much more attractive than myself also and if I include myself in the fantasy I have my fiance pick this other women over me.So, I dont understand this fantasy one bit! But it sure is a reaccuring favorite of mine!...Anyone have any input or can anyone relate?
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2003
Wed, 07-21-2004 - 4:20pm
Dear Heidi,

This is a pretty common fantasy although usually a male one. I suspect the reason that it is exciting to you is that it is "not okay"...it's a taboo. The more taboo a situation is the more exciting. Your strong aversion to this really happening fuels the fantasy and makes it more exciting. Also, there is a veuristic quality to it that makes it exciting as well. I suspect that men find this one particularly tittilating because of they are so visually turned on.

I don't think that I have heard of a woman having this fantasy, but if take a look through the archives of the "taboo's" website, it comes up from men a lot. Chances are you are a very visually excited woman and that is why this fantasy has an appeal.

Pretty normal stuff.

Peace.

Scott.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2004
Wed, 07-21-2004 - 4:31pm
Hehehe...that's pretty funny about it being a common male fantasy, because I mentioned all this to my fiance and he thought it was pretty strange. I told him to try it and to imagine me with one of his male friends or another women....He did try, but he said it bothered him...Works for me though!
Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 07-21-2004 - 4:41pm
Hmmm, no I can't relate to this one.

Maybe your insecurity about your guy with other women is manifesting itself as stress and that stress lends itself to sexual arousal for you. Kind of like the soldier masturbating in the foxhole. GOOD stress is just a hair's breadth away from arousal.

And many people enjoy being humiliated and dominated. Maybe this is something to explore with your partner?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Wed, 07-21-2004 - 5:12pm
I cannot relate to that fantasy. I never picture my hubby with anyone, but moi! I mentioned on another "jealousy topic thread" that I don't like women flirting, smiling too much with my husband or standing too close. I come completely un-done. I guess that might stem from being cheated on during my first marriage and my first husband being a real flirt, I don't know. But anywho --- no, never had that fantasy!