Advice on voicing my needs........
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Advice on voicing my needs........
| Wed, 01-02-2008 - 5:19pm |
So, I have been dating this guy for about a month and a half. We talked when we first started spending time together and agreed that we were going to take our time and get to know each other better before we took our relationship to the physical level. We waited and learned more about each other, it has been great. Last night we slept together for the first time. It was wonderful. I was a little nervous, but I think that is just the "OMG, he is going to see me naked" thing every woman goes through.

Welcome to the board, duchess.
I think it would have been a lot easier to have this conversation before you had sex. Since you didn't, you have to make sure that you don't make him feel as if he's not satisfying you when you do talk to him. (Even if he isn't satisfying you fully at this point, your relationship is so new, it's likely to change over the next couple of months as the two of you become more comfortable with each other.)
Maybe start your conversation by letting him know that you felt you were not in a mutually satisfying relationship in the past, and let him know that you want to avoid falling into a similar situation. Tell him the things that you feel are important to you and ask him how he feels about those things.
I think you need to be delicate with this talk because of the stage that your relationship is at. This is new to him also, and both of you are still learning about one another. Being too demanding may put him off. Personally, I like learning about my partner through action -- not words, and then using words if I feel the relationship is falling short of my expectations.
You have had sex ONE time.