Anal sex
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Anal sex
| Wed, 04-25-2007 - 11:40pm |
My partner and i were having sex (missionary man on top)
and we'd talked about anal before so he decided he would give it a try
i dont know if it was the position or something,
but it hurt sooooooo much i had to push him off me and lay there and wait for the pain to go away
he also said "why did it hurt you so much?"
im so confused i feel i might of made him feel bad or embarrased him or something and i dont think he will want to try it again but i still want to
help me?
and we'd talked about anal before so he decided he would give it a try
i dont know if it was the position or something,
but it hurt sooooooo much i had to push him off me and lay there and wait for the pain to go away
he also said "why did it hurt you so much?"
im so confused i feel i might of made him feel bad or embarrased him or something and i dont think he will want to try it again but i still want to
help me?

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That isn't something you just decide to do, and then DO it. It takes preparation. It usually does hurt for a moment as it goes in, but if you take your time, and use LOTS of lube....it's tolerable. He's supposed to start with his fingers, one, then two, etc. to relax the anal sphincter.
Also, I hope you know that you never go from anal to vaginal without stopping to wash carefully....or you will transfer anal bacteria to the vagina, and get a nasty infection.
Welcome to the board hazelleyez.
It sounds like you weren't prepared for him to enter, and that can be very painful. It's good that you stopped, as damage can be done otherwise.
It's important that you are relaxed when trying anal sex, and he needs to go very slowly so that you have time to adjust to him entering you. If you push out (as if you are going to poop), as he enters you, then you can not clinch your muscles. It makes it a bit easier and less painful. Lube is very important ... once you think you have used enough, use some more.
Some people prepare (some even for months) with anal toys and fingers, but not everyone does. Each of you having already had an orgasm also makes you more relaxed and patient. Position is very helpful too. I find spooning to be the most comfortable, and some women like to do WOT. When you talk to your BF, let him know that going slowly and using lots of lube are the two most important things.
"the woman should by some sort of numbing solution to numb any pain you might feel if you tear."
Sorry, don't want to shoot down your idea, but numbing agents are not a good idea. Pain is your bodies way of saying there is something wrong. If there is pain, you need to stop. Using a numbing agent might cause you to do damage to your body, so it is not recommended.
For some people, it takes more than one attempt to successfully have anal sex.
Did you use lube my SO and I have anal but we use lots and lots of lube and that doesnt seem to bother her no pain there shouldnt be pain.
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