are we failing today's young women

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
are we failing today's young women
25
Mon, 01-10-2005 - 1:05am

I've just read two posts regarding pubic shaving. One says that no (American) man will date a "hairy" girl and another says that to be natural is unhygenic and gives you spots. Now, I'm not just speaking of these two posters - as I've read these sentiments here quite a number of times here.

I'm not going to argue the aesthetics or sensory issues of the discussion because this post is not about the pros and cons of pubic shaving. My issue is: how can we have let these girls grow into young women who's comments show such ignorance or lack of self esteem? What have we - as a society - done wrong?

I really hope that when my DD grows up, she has enough self esteem to avoid a man who would refuse to date her because she may choose pubic hair. Why can't these young women understand that a man who would leave you because of pubic hair is too shallow to date? His behaviour simply shows that he's in it only for the sex....obviously, if hair is a deal breaker - her mind doesn't matter.

As for unhygenic? How do the posters think that women who've never shaved cope? Honestly, it's not like their bits are rotting and dropping off in the street. For that matter, it's not like they have any higher rates of bacteria than a shaved woman. Have these ignorant posters never heard of soap? Or - perhaps it's the opposite - maybe they are neurotic about their vulvas and feel that the slightest hint of moisture is bad. That in itself is bad - how can they enjoy their sexuality if they think their vulvas are dirty?

You know, when I was a teen, all we needed was a tube of pimple cream and a tube of lipstick. Now days, they are getting waxed, manicured and pedicured, fake tans and solariums - not to mention requesting plastic surgery. According to some posters here, you've simply "gotta do it".

Are we breeding a whole generation of vain women who think that how they look is the only thing that matters?




Edited 1/10/2005 5:25 am ET ET by iv_aisha2004
Dress Up Games, Doll Makers and Cartoon Dolls @ The Doll Palace

Pages

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 01-11-2005 - 2:57am

A daughter can and should have a father's (or a male who cares for her) influence in her life whether he lives with the family or not.

But I can only speak from my own experience of having a father who built my self esteem and taught me to set high standards for myself AND my partners. I truly believe it's imperative for mothers to recognize how important a male figure is to a young girl's development and sense of herself as a woman.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Tue, 01-11-2005 - 8:09am
I agree with that so much.

bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-20-2004
Tue, 01-11-2005 - 5:03pm
iv I agree with you...immaturity and inexperiance can be mistaken for ignorance..One thought...Not everyone has a high IQ, and not everyone comes from a family where common sense was evident.Maturity and experiance are good and sometimes untimely teachers. ...Some of these young ones maybe have heard that the popular "hot" guy likes his girls shaven..who knows..but I tend to think along the same line as you do on most subjects...Women today need to know they have way more choices than women from a few years back when it comes to their own bodies. The choices they make are not always sound ones, but they are still their choices none the less.
The smart ones will learn from "mistakes" and move on.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
Tue, 01-11-2005 - 6:28pm

>>Not everyone has a high IQ, and not everyone comes from a family where common sense was evident.<<

(sigh) Ah yes, thank you for reminding me.

Dress Up Games, Doll Makers and Cartoon Dolls @ The Doll Palace
Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 01-11-2005 - 6:29pm
Amen Tish. My Dad died when I was 18 and what he gave me was immeasurable in preparing me for life.

Pages