arouses quickly

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2005
arouses quickly
8
Mon, 05-30-2005 - 11:40pm
My friend and i have recently started having sex with each other we are good friends and we care about each other and our arrangement seems to work fine for both of us. However he gets really aroused very quickly all it takes is a simple kiss and he is ready to go its almost like he can get hard on command.Is that normal? I am really attracted to him but i need a little more foreplay. I am really not that experienced so some feed back would be appreciated.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2004
Mon, 05-30-2005 - 11:56pm

What has his erection got to do with how much foreplay you need or get? He can give you foreplay while he's erect....and you can be doing the same for him. If he's trying to skip foreplay, just tell him to slow down, and don't let him proceed until you're ready.

That's what FWB's are about. You're friends, and you're BOTH entitled to benefits.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 12:37am

Getting hard that quickly is pretty normal.

Tell him that you need more foreplay. It's not a competition and you should both be enjoying yourselves. Guys have an advantage that they can get up and going really fast but sometimes, with some things, faster isn't better. It won't hurt him learning how to take his time and really please a woman. A quick session of sex is nice sometimes but it's also nice to take your time and take turn pleasing one another. 50/50 remember.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2005
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 3:34am
Consider this friend your training board. If you need more foreplay, then you must tell him. Along with all the physical action, communication is one key factor to great sex. Use this time to learn how to verbally express your physical needs. Also, you may want to discuss your roles in this relationship because you don't need to get yourself hurt if you are totally attracted to him. Good luck and have safe fun!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 7:21am
As the others said, you want and need more foreplay, then tell him what you want.

bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2005
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 9:58pm
Most of the time he is really great. He takes his time and makes sure that i am enjoying myself too. and then sometimes it's like he is in a hurry to get to the finish line. I have never been in a relationship like this before(fwb)I know that it is more common these days and am also aware that it ruins alot of friendships. The sex is amazing but his friendship means more to me and i am worried that we will screw it up somehow. We talk everyday he often brings me lunch at work and we have breakfast every weekend. We are very open with each other and agree it is because we are really comfortable with one another.I guess I am just a little worried that we will lose that somehow because sex can complicate things. To be honest i am not even sure how we got to this point.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Tue, 05-31-2005 - 11:09pm

Just be aware that the moment that he finds someone-else this relationship and friends thing could end just like that. Sex does complicate friendships, but at the same time, some friendships wouldn't exist if there wasn't a mutual attraction.

I'm just curious why the two of you have found yourselves in this situation. Sounds like you should be dating rather than in a FWB situation because you see and do so much together. Traditionally people in FWB relationships don't see each other every day and don't always socialise together all the time. It's just a convenience thing for both of them when they do see one another. Personally I think that the idea of FWB has got a bit out of hand and guys and girls are often finding themselves used by one partner that doesn't want to be tied down, rather than being in a true FWB situation where neither partner wants to be tied down.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2004
Wed, 06-01-2005 - 12:22pm
Younger guys tend to get turned out quickly like that. Especially those hormone filled teenagers. I know that my DH sometimes will get aroused with a very passionate kiss (the kind I tease him with when he knows we can't make love). It isn't abnormal.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2005
Wed, 06-01-2005 - 10:06pm
I am not really sure how we went from friends to sex. It happened a few weeks ago he invited me over and things just happened.I was a little surprised, we have known each other for six monthes and allthough he hugs me everytime he sees me he had never tried to kiss me. I always thought fwb was really weird and not something I had ever considered before with any of my other male friends so I am concerned that I will become more attached than he will it seems sex is different for men.He has been very upfront about not getting seriouse with anyone due to the fact that he was engaged and his fiance was killed in an accident two weeks before thier wedding and his next girlfriend cheated on him. He has said he doesn't want to get hurt and he doesn't want to hurt anyone else therfore I don't think he is interested in dating. I am not complaining but am a little confused that we spend so much time together or talking on the phone. He calls me from work just to say hi and tell me to have a good day.I know it's not the typical fwb but I don't want to read more into it than what it really is.