Bad boys?..whats the attraction?
Find a Conversation
Bad boys?..whats the attraction?
| Mon, 09-20-2004 - 4:58pm |
Is it true that many women want a really nice guy, but only after they have had their brains screwed out by all the bad boys they can handle? What is the attraction of a male slut, who treats a woman so poorly?

Pages
>>but I also believe that if a woman has no moral, and sleeps with him the first night, no matter how good this bad boy can get, he will never take her seriously<<
Claudia,
>>Its about insecurity, ego,curiousity,etc. People rationalise it by saying they "love sex" or they want different experiances, or one person cant satisfy my needs..whatever. They are searching for who they really are.<<
Sure there may be some out there that have sex with various partners for the reasons you mention. Curiousity and experience may have been factors for me when I was younger, but they no longer are, nor are any of the other reasons you mention. Your comments make me wonder whether you have gone long stretches of adult life without sex or affection. Sex and affection are basic human needs. And when I don't get them because I'm not in a relationship, I still need them and then I get them elsewhere. Does this make me a bad person or one that will not be able to be monogomous when I am in a relationship? Doubtful, as I have been monogomous in previous long term relationships. I find your reasoning unnecessarily extreme. If you in fact were more promiscuous in your youth why weren't you one of the people who slid down the slippery slope you describe?
my point is, things haven't worked out not because of ego, insecurity, curiosity, etc., that you mentioned before. i was monogomous in these relationships, but there were serious issues that we weren't able to work through.
of course sex and affection are not the only things needed for a lasting relationship. but as i stated before, they are things i still need when not in a long term relationship. hence, my occasional encounters of the short term nature.
When you see a woman with an abusive, unfaithful bad boy, consider yourself fortunate.
You found out early that she's damaged goods with emotional problems, instead of getting involved with her and finding out later after she's dragged you down.
She can be book smart, successful, and drop-dead gorgeous...but the second she starts dating a bad boy, she reveals her biggest weakness: her self-hatred and low-self-esteem.
Also, the bad boys also have low-self-esteem. The fact that they have to go to so much trouble to project a false image of supposedly being tough and aloof and a rebel means that they are actually very insecure and weak and uncomfortable with themselves.
So...low-self-esteem attracts low-self-esteem.
When a confident, healthy good guy sees a woman with a bad boy, he should breathe a sigh of relief that he isn't involved with a woman who is that messed up.
Edited 10/2/2004 4:33 pm ET ET by life_is_but_a_dream
Pages