bfdoesnt make me wet... really upsetting
Find a Conversation
| Thu, 04-19-2007 - 12:35pm |
Basically I've been with my borfriend for 2 years and the only time I ever got wet was when we first hade sex. I love him to bits and do find him very attractive, sometimes when we are kissing I want him so bad and yet nothing happens down there.
For us this has never really been a problem but it does upset me, because I know that I don't have a physical problem, sometimes I watch porn and that does make me work but when I watch it feel upset and sometimes disgusted with myself and never think "oh that sexy..etc".
neither of us have ever been with anyone else so I don't know if it's just him, but it worries me and makes me very nervous about ever having sex with anyone else.Does anyone have any advice? I'd really like to get over this problem because I'd like my bf to know that I do find him sexually attractive and im going to university this year and dont want this hanging over my head for any future relationships.

Your b/f doesn't "make" you wet. That's up to you. Usually, foreplay, which is necessary for a woman's arousal will do it. Is he skipping foreplay! If so, don't let him. For most women, that's more important than intercourse, and more women have orgasms from clitoral stimulation than from intercourse.
If you're getting plenty of foreplay, then it's probably you worrying about it that causes it. It's called a "self fulfilling prophecy". It happened, it upset you, you worried about it the next time, and guess what? The worrying caused it to happen again.
In the meantime, that's what sexual lubricants are made for. Get some and use it, and that will probably relax you enough that you'll start lubricating on your own.
To learn more about how your body works, check out www.the-clitoris.com and it wouldn't hurt your b/f to look at it too.
Hi qwerty and welcome to the board. A lot of things can contribute to dryness. As others have mentioned, foreplay is essential. If you feel there is ample foreplay, you might be nervous and contributing to the problem. Outside things can affect your natural lubrication too. Diet -- caffeine and alcohol can both cause problems with dryness. So can smoking and some medications.
Have you tried watching porn with your BF? If so does that make a difference in your own wetness?