Boyfriend loses erection
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| Wed, 04-05-2006 - 11:40am |
Me and my boyfriend love each other so much and we're very attracted to each other, but he loses his erection during foreplay. He's very hard in the beginning, but if we just kiss then he loses it and then I might get it hard again by oral or manual stimulation, but then he loses it again.
He says I'm not doing anything wrong, but that he is tense when it comes to thinking about intercourse. That he think too much. I try to comfort him the best I can, telling him it happens to everyone and that I think it will be fine. He feels so bad about this.
But we talk openly about it, and I don't really know what to do. Ok we haven't tried more than about 3 times but still.. I'm afraid something is wrong with me. I ask him what he wants me to do, but it doesn't help. He gets hard, then soft, hard again and so on. But it seems like it's difficult to keep it.
Could it be that he needs stimulation all the time, and how is that possible. I want a foreplay that is focused on me too... He's had a gf for 4 years before so he must be quite experienced, much more than I am and I don't feel nervous at all around him. And we have known each other for 11 months and been together for two so he shouldn't be uncomfortable with me.. I'm just afraid also that if we doesnt solve this problem it will be bad for our relationship. I'm not that worried yet, I think it will be ok, but still...
Any advice please?

I answered your post above but you will have to be patient and give this more time to resolve itself. Continue to ask for what you need and take the emphasis off intercourse for the time being.
I believe in being proactive when it comes to problems, but this is one that you'll have to trust him to deal with himself. Encourage him to get a checkup if it doesn't resolve itself with time and go from there.
Let me get this right?
He gets soft if he isn't being stimulated or if he is busy giving you foreplay?
He CAN get hard enough for intercourse and you CAN have intercourse successfully?
Sounds pretty normal to me. Every guy is a little different and I know that some guys just get hard and stay hard until they cum, but not everyone is like that. I know that if I'm distracted doing something else or the stimulation stops for more than a few minutes then my erection will usually subside. However it'll easily come back once it gets some more attention or I start thinking about it again.