Bum stuff...is this normal??

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2003
Bum stuff...is this normal??
2
Wed, 09-22-2004 - 1:07am
Tonight when my fiance and I were having sex, he wanted me to touch his anus. Now, we've done this before, and I didn't have a problem with it, but we haven't done it for quite a while. We've had anal sex, and I could take it or leave it... it doesn't excite me much. Once he bought this butt plug toy, but we've never tried it because anal just doesn't do much for me. Well, tonight he suggested we try it...but on him. We didn't end up doing it, since we were already in the middle of sex. Instead I just fondled him around his anus a little bit. I just found it a little odd that he finds so much pleasure when I do that. I want to know if this could mean that he has bisexual tendencies. I mean, we've been together for a long time, and there is not much to suggest that this might be the case, but I have never been with someone who wanted something up their butt. Can anyone tell me if this is abnormal??

One of the reasons this topic came up with us is because I told him that I would love it if he could perform oral sex more often. It's not his favourite activity, and I can not understand why. Again, I've never been with a guy who didn't LOVE giving oral sex. I love to give oral, myself, so it was starting to bug me that I never really get it often in return. I've asked him why he doesn't like doing it...like, if maybe I don't smell or taste good... he says that's not it. He does have a very sensitive nose, though, so I thought that might have something to do with it. He just says it's not his favourite sexual activity, and he'd rather have intercourse. I told him that it's great for foreplay, and he agreed to do it more often. I just wish he enjoyed it more, because that makes me enjoy it more, too. I think that this whole oral sex thing is what started the butt touching thing. I would really appreciate some input! ~Sabrina
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2004
Wed, 09-22-2004 - 1:59am
There's no such thing as "normal" when it comes to sex. Anal play, inserting fingers or other objects, rimming (licking the anus) is not unusual, and many men like it. It is NOT bisexual, homosexual or anything other than purely sexual. It's something that many men (and women) like, and if he likes it, it's normal for him. It's probably because the prostate is there, and it feels good to have it touched or massaged.

Just as you're not crazy about anal sex, he's not crazy about cunnilingus. That's unfortunate, but that's how we humans are. Some like these things, some don't. As long as he's willing to do it anyway, enjoy. Some men refuse completely!

PS: not all homosexual men practice anal sex. Some just give each other oral sex. Why is it that no one accuses a straight man of being anything but straight just because they enjoy oral sex?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Wed, 09-22-2004 - 7:53am

He is completely normal and anal play on the male and female are very common.


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