can you help me??

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2004
can you help me??
6
Sun, 01-16-2005 - 7:55am

hi i was wondering if you could help me,

my boyfriend of a year has an obsession with my bottom, its all he ever used 2 talk about and pay attention to, i have been dieting for a while now im really thin now but with two problems, i dont hav an bum no more and i also dont have breasts no more either, i think hes starting to loose intrest, how could i get my bum and breasts back without putting on weight?
please help me, hes the most important person in my life and i dont want him to loose intrest
thank you in advance

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-22-2004
In reply to: nobimbo
Sun, 01-16-2005 - 8:36am

I am curious as to how much weight you lost and how you lost it. Sounds familiar, like tons of starving, but with exercise, I wouldn't expect you to lose your rear 'that' much that he'd notice such a stark difference like this.

I'd think staying healthy staying thin would keep your ribs/chest at a nice level that would still enhance the bust somewhat, but thats just my own thinking. Keeping up with the exercise, I'd also think that such activity would rather "tone" your rear rather than simply shrink it away.

Only idea I have is that if you dieted without the toning exercising, then I'd pick up on that toning schedule. Only clue I can personally think of based upon what you've mentioned.

This TRULY isn't the first time I've read/heard about a guy adoring a more "packaged" body of a girlfriend the way that body was and then didn't seem as excited about it when she started losing that nice package that he liked. Not saying its common, but boy does it happen more than we think.

Hopefully he'll enjoy your body for YOU as well as for how attractive it is on its own.

I look forward to the replies coming up, I think this'll be quite the interesting topic you started and we'll all learn something I'm sure. :)

C h a r a c t e r


above all else


Mr. Para

 

C  H  A  R  A  C  T  E  R

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2004
In reply to: nobimbo
Sun, 01-16-2005 - 8:50am
thanx 4 your reply, i lost the weight by starving myself, i was a size 12, now im a size 8, i turned anorexcic 4 a while and them my boyfriend made me eat again, i noticed i was outting on the weight again so i bought this thing, that you put pads on2 your body and it burns fat and tones your body, i dont know if i want to put it on my breasts and bum incase it takes away what little i have left
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2004
In reply to: nobimbo
Sun, 01-16-2005 - 9:37am

Are you a bum and breasts, or are you a person? If that's all he's interested in...then he wouldn't be much of a loss.

YOU should be the most important person in your life, and if you feel you need to starve yourself to please him, then your priorities are seriously messed up. If a man loves you, he love the WHOLE you, no matter what size your bum or your breasts.

Starving is not the way to lose weight, and "pads" don't change your body. A sensible diet, and exercise is how you lose weight and re-shape your body.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
In reply to: nobimbo
Sun, 01-16-2005 - 10:19am

There are no pads that will make you loose fat and gain muscle tone.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2004
In reply to: nobimbo
Sun, 01-16-2005 - 7:41pm
I have had almost the same problem... I am a very picky eater and have always been thin because of it... I don't think I have an eating disorder, But my ex used to bitch about how thin I was. It grossed him out. But I've never had much of a butt or boobs, but even if I loose weight mine don't change, but nothing else does either so I don't know what to tell you... It just seems really unfair that the messages that are shoved in our faces all the time say that we are not thin enough or beautiful enough so people lose weight and wear make-up then the boys tell us they don't like it. But for me the problem goes beyond that... I am thin and thats all there is too it, ya I could eat a little more, but no matter how much I eat I cannot gain more than 5 lbs. I have never weighed more that 120lbs and I am 5'8''. I think that people need to focus less on the outside and more on the inside.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2004
In reply to: nobimbo
Mon, 01-17-2005 - 4:35am

I do agree with others that if your bf was only interested in your bum and breasts, then he's not the one for you anyways... However, I'll suggest another possible point of view.

He met you, a size 12 girl, and found you so attractive. Within a year you turned into a size 8, by choosing to be anorexic. So when you're together, you don't eat and starve yourself. It's becoming less fun being with you, because sometimes it's dreadful having dinner with someone who doesn't eat, or maybe you've lost energy to do activities you used to do. Maybe he's turned off by your physical change OR your obssessive attitude with dieting OR a combination of both factors.

I think maybe you should seek professonal help with your self-esteem issue. As far as wanting to lose more weight and gain some bums, exercise and eat properly, but this means nothing if you don't learn how to be happy with yourself.