confidence on top!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-18-2005
confidence on top!!
3
Mon, 07-18-2005 - 10:09am
I dont have the confidence to go 'on top' in the bedroom... in the past, two of my ex partners were younger than me and therefore inexperienced in that department so going on top was always natural. Now my new boyfriend is ten years older than me and really experienced when it comes to sex... im scared to death that when im top im doing something wrong and i desperately dont want to dissapoint him,. i go really tense, feel so uncomfortable and dontv seem to be able to get my legs in the right place. I cant relax and end up climbing off feeling like a failure everytime. What can i do to change this way of thinking as its really really getting me down???!!! Any tips on what to when im on top??!!!! HELP
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Mon, 07-18-2005 - 10:39am

There is no right or wrong way, it's whatever feels good to you.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-12-2002
Mon, 07-18-2005 - 11:20pm

Be honest with him. Tell him that you're not used to being with someone so experienced, you're nervous that you won't live up to his expectations, and that you would like him to help you get it right if you do something he doesn't enjoy. That way he won't build up his expectations as much, and if there is something you're not doing to his satisfaction then he will know it's OK to ask you to do something a different way.

Good luck

Janet

 


 


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2005
Tue, 07-19-2005 - 1:52am

<<>>

There's only one way to "change this way of thinking" and that's by CLIMBING ON TOP!!! Can a person learn to swim without getting into water? How many bad cuts does it take before a hairdresser is a professional?

This year is the first time I've been on top and I too didn't know what to do, but that didn't faze him in the least. Posters here gave me some great advise (gyrate side-side; swirl hips; press onto his pelvic) and he's having a wonderful time as I'm learning and trying. Being on top is also allowing me to become more agressive in our sexual play.

Most importantly, I talk about not knowing what to do. I tell him when I'm tired in that position and we turn/roll-over. Communication is the key a great sex life! Good luck!