cummin on my face

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-17-2004
cummin on my face
27
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 6:43pm
My first time post. My boyfriend keeps cummin on my face when he knows I don't like it.It happened three times and I asked him nicely to stop it.Its not the worst thing, but this last time he actually held my head and it pissed me off.Why do guys like to do this?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2003
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 8:29pm
I would definitely, without question, get rid of this guy. This is not doing you any good. It's not the facials, it's that he is doing something you do not want him to do and you have told him so. That is absolutely utter disrespect and it's unacceptable.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 8:42pm
If you feel degraded by it, then tell him so. Then if he continues to do it, he is not respecting your wishes. You could also turn the tables on him and sit on his face for a really long time and when he tries to move you off, tell him you're not ready to get off and want to sit there awhile longer! Just a thought. But I would say after only 3and 1/2 months, that it is a little early for him to be showing disrespect.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Mon, 05-17-2004 - 9:44pm

You told him you don't like it and you feel degraded.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2003
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 10:12am
I totally agree, this is abuse. It really sounds like the tip of the iceberg of something really uncool, even dangerous .

I love giving facials, have done it hundreds of times, but the odds of my doing it with less than 100% enthusiasm on my partner's part would be precisely zero.

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anonymous user
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 10:19am
I think that answer is indeed as obvious as most of the other posters have said, HE HAS TO GO!! Anybody that did something I didn't want against my will would get the boot so quickly, I tell you what!

Melanie

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2003
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 11:19am
I agree. THis guy needs to go and go now.

My wife and I enjoy facials -- but they are part of the mutually enjoyed sex act. I would never do it if she didn't want it.

This guy is using you for sex. And what he is doing is sexual assault.

I don't even know what redeeming qualities this guy may have, but if I were you I would get rid of him right now. At the least I would say "if you ever did that again, you're gone" -- and then I'd stick to my word.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2004
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 12:21pm
>>I love giving facials, have done it hundreds of times, but the odds of my doing it with less than 100% enthusiasm on my partner's part would be precisely zero.<<

Very good answer. I agree totally. Everything can be done, but without 100% enthusiasm from my SO, it's a no go. I am not going to push her into a situation that she doesn't want in the first place. If she doesn't mind, then I don't mind if we don't do it. If she wants to try it, then lets give it a shot. I have done a few facials, and the women who took them were happy to do it, but once done, that was enough for them. It was kind of cool, but I thought it was degrading, and so I didn't do it anymore, or rather very often. I personally think they are degrading unless the situation is right, the two people are right with it, and they want to do it. Otherwise, open up, it's coming!! LOL Anyway, if the woman doesn't want to get semen in her mouth, might as well keep your mouth away from my penis. No use there. LOL I would prefer to just please her, than have her end up with something she doesn't want. Abuse?? I am not in total agreement on that one. I have done things even after my SO has stated her dislike for them, but then again, most of that is not to her, it is other things. So, my advice as usual is TELL YOUR BF to STOP. PERIOD. If he insistes, remind him that rape carries a heavy sentence in this country, and that teeth can sever appendages just like a knife. They are a lot harder to put back on after being bitten off then cut off. LOL Or, Just keep your mouth away from his penis for a long, long time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2003
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 2:39pm
>>I would prefer to just please her, than have her end up with something she doesn't want.<<

Absolutely. Life is too short. I can't imagine there's any psychic pleasure in doing this if she's not totally, utterly into it. So then why do it? If it's just for the physical pleasure, the guy can just go masturbate. Then no one will get an eye put out! ;-)

Seriously, though: I just don't GET why anyone would want to subject anyone to anything they weren't totally into ... especially when you know full well they'll never do it again "with feeling." The original poster's predicament is the root of so much of that truly awful abuse that transpired in Iraq, it seems to me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2003
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 2:59pm
It's YOUR BODY, so therefore, ONLY YOU know it's limitations....both emotionally and physically. Any man who would not encourage you to stay within those boundaries and limitations and on top of that, defy them, is a man who is out for himself. Three times is three too many. He's not stupid, he's just disrespectful and self-centered--not pretty.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2004
Tue, 05-18-2004 - 3:41pm
"I have done things even after my SO has stated her dislike for them, but then again, most of that is not to her, it is other things".

I just wanted to comment that men do, in fact, do things to or with their SO's even after they have stated "not this time" or "maybe next time", etc., but that isn't abuse - like jeep says. To me, that's having your way with manhandling your SO. At least that is how I think of it. I like manhandling and my hubby knows that, so when I say "not this time" or "maybe next time", he will still continue to do whatever it is knowing full well that I will like it. I actually get more turned on when he holds me down or spreads my legs out further or whatever. Now, sometimes I really don't! And I get upset afterwards. We have a word we use now. Haven't used it yet, but it was a good idea I got from this board. So, even jeep has gone ahead and done things knowing his SO didn't really like them.