desperately seeking advice

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2005
desperately seeking advice
11
Sat, 05-28-2005 - 11:57pm

Hello,

I haven't been on here so long that I forgot I was registered lol

I am a woman in her 30's who is still a virgin. I have met a GREAT guy and am ready to have sex but I have issues I need help with.
1) I am sooo afraid he will think I'm a loser if I tell him I'm a virgin, but I am SO inexperienced that I can't NOT tell him- plus we've been honest with each other about pretty much everything else.
2) I have a vaginal skin problem that results in a burning feeling pretty frequently and I'm terrified that it will be so painful that it will ruin the experience.

I have never felt like this about anyone before and I want to be with him SO badly. He definately wants it too but I've been putting it off because of the above issues. Part of me thinks I should just "go for it" but I tend to over-analyze everything lol

Thanks for your time.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-01-2005
Fri, 06-03-2005 - 5:29pm

Yes, my hymen was intact. And yes, it did hurt a little when I tore it. I don't like anything about my own body to be a mystery, so I took a gander before and after I used the vibrator. My hymen was sort of a crescent moon shape and I noticed a small (maybe 3 or 4 centimeter) tear in it. There was a small amount of blood, but nothing like I expected (I had images of the elevator doors opening in 'The Shining'). ;) There was also a small amount of bleeding after the first time I had sex and I was noticably more 'open' than before.

I spoke with my doctor about the yeast infection, and she informed me that it was normal even if it's not very common. Yeast infections can develop by taking antibiotics, as we all know and have probably experienced. But they can also be brought on by natural hormonal changes, adverse reactions to condoms, spermicides, lubricants, etc., as well as lack of lubrication and excess friction. I'm not exactly sure what brought mine on, but it was very mild and went away a day after using the usual OTC treatment.

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