Did he have to try and sleep with me?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-29-2004
Did he have to try and sleep with me?
12
Tue, 07-20-2004 - 2:08pm


Would he try to sleep with me on a first date if he really liked me?

Do those things have anything to do with one another?

Should I assume he thinks I'm easy, or is sleeping with the girl something guys have to try no matter what?

I'm confused, please help me.

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-13-2004
Thu, 07-22-2004 - 4:39pm
My ex-boyfriend and I never went on "dates" per se - we knew eachother for a while, hooked up (things got pretty steamy the first time), then the second time we grabbed something to eat and we came SO close to having sex, but we didn't... (because I was like, uh, no)... but we kept dating and we didn't sleep together until ALMOST TWO MONTHS LATER!!!

Granted, that was hard, but I held back and he respected that. But he (we) did consider it on the second "date"... but that doesn't mean he didn't respect me... he just wanted me ;-)

I'm glad we held back because then we were able to get closer before throwing in the possible complications of sex. . . and then when it happened, it happened. I still don't blame him for trying early, it just happens sometimes... but he agreed it was better that we waited (ok, he agrees begrudgingly)... I guess maybe he could already see where the relationship was heading (that it would BE one) but I wasn't sure yet.

Let us know how it turns out...

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Thu, 07-22-2004 - 10:29pm
Why wouldn't he try to sleep with you?

It all seems very, very normal dating behaviour for this day and age. You've met him a few times over the last month, there's attraction there, alcohol is involved, you make out with him a couple of times and get all worked up, you want to stay awake until after midnight so you invite him back to your place late at night.... what in this picture says "You're NOT getting sex tonight"?

I'm not in the slightest surprised that he tried to sleep with you. All the signs that you wanted to were there. This day and age a guy can really like you AND still want to sleep with you straight away. It's not like in times past when a man would wait days, weeks or months because he respected you. It might turn you off but it's pretty normal behaviour - and when doesn't it turn you off? All going well, there's going to be a day when you'd WANT him to try to sleep with you.

Still, sounds like he reacted OK when you turned him down. Provided you did it reasonably nicely and didn't yell, scream or cuss him out, he'll be back. Or if he isn't back it's not because you wouldn't sleep with him. It'll be another reason.

Pages