Dirty Talk

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2006
Dirty Talk
4
Wed, 06-28-2006 - 11:28am
How do I get my guy to talk dirty in bed? I'm pretty blunt and open about sex and I've even said while in bed "talk dirty to me" or "I wanna hear You". I think he tries but its usually the same type of thing and not exactly the "get me there" words I'm looking for?
Any tips?
Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: nitebutterfly
Sat, 07-08-2006 - 1:42am
Be specific in what you want. Tell him the words that "get you there." If you want rude and crude, than ask for that. If you want descriptive, then ask for that. But you'll have to understand if he's not into it or finds it more difficult to be so blunt. Not everyone is turned on by dirty talk or comes by it naturally.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
In reply to: nitebutterfly
Sun, 07-09-2006 - 12:46pm

Agreed.

As men, we get a lot of conflicting messages about what is appropriate and inappropriate with women, and women don't seem to have reached any agreement either, 'cept the guy "should have known better". I know one well educated and literate woman who refers to parts of her body using the same "C" word that many other women consider absolutely offensive. A sensitive (or smart) guy will always chose to err on the side of caution, you may want him to talk dirty, but part of him is probably scared silly that if he says one word "too dirty", he's in big trouble.

Make sure he understands you asked for it, and you won't toss him out if he says "too much". Lead by example, and ask him leading questions to provoke the response you want. AND, don't get offended by anything he does say. :)

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: nitebutterfly
Mon, 07-10-2006 - 12:02am

I'm not so sure it's always about giving conflicting messages though, lickity, although that definitely happens. But more about varying sensitivities and tastes.

Not all women (or men, for that matter) enjoy hearing that kind of language, in bed or out...even from a Spouse or SO. One can't assume that because one woman enjoys it, that another will, so proceed with caution AND communication first...the CLEAN kind.