Do you end a realtionship over sex issue
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Do you end a realtionship over sex issue
| Mon, 06-20-2005 - 11:31am |
Hey to all! It's me again! I am the one who has just started having sex and as I mentioned before my partner is very small in that department. I know you all have said to try different positions and the more we have sex the better it will get. Well, we had sex this weekend with me on top, it didn't help. He loved it, but he still didn't hit my spot. I think it is impossible for me to orgasm during intercourse. I also worried that he would get off quicker ( I wasn't sure when he would cum) and I wanted to prolong intercourse in hopes of orgasm so we switched back to the missionary position. Plus while I was on top he kept slipping out of me at times. His size has to be an issue! I care for him and since he was my first I would like to continue to be with him. BUT I am so curious to experience sex with someone else to see if I am more pleased with it. He talks as if we are going to have a long future together, but the sex just isn't doing it for me. Is sex a reason to end a realtionship? How can I make this better and satisfy myself and my curiousity? I am more stimulated with his finger inside me and I asked him to continue to mess with me to see if I could get off, but I hope he wasn't offended by me loving that. He SO WANTS to please me, but I don't think I will be completely satisfied until I orgasm during intercourse!

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I am glad to hear that someone else has experienced this as well. Sorry for you to have to gone through this, but at least you can relate! I care for him and I will continue with our relationship. It is just hard without knowing other experiences. Although you are right, there is probably someone else out there that will fit (fulfill) me better, however, there probably isn't someone out there that is a better fit for him. Considering he is the only one that I have been with, I fit him like a glove! lol!
>>I hate to say it and someone will surely scorn me for this.. however... size does matter! <<
I'm not going to scorn you. Of course size matters, just not to all women. In this situation where it seems that she's with a nice guy, it would be a shame to get hung up on the idea that a big penis will suddenly cure all the problems. That's really unlikely to be the case, especially as she's not really experienced.
It's quite possible that with a bit of experience and experimentation she will find that sex can be good with this guy. Take the "on-top" experience for example. Very negative results with that so far - but now she knows that she was more or less doing it wrong. There would be very few guys that anyone can bounce madly up and down on and keep their penis in them all the time. The grinding is much more effective.
I'm not saying that she shouldn't leave the guy and find a guy that has a big penis. If she wants to do that, by all means do it. I'm suggesting that she should hang in there a bit longer if she actually likes the guy.
Kassie,
Although it obviously varies between women, I still realize that size DOES matter, whether uncomfortably big or unsatisfyingly small...I just don't recall any woman actually claim to enjoy ALL sizes, LOL!, different sizes are either too much, too little, or just right enough to work with.
Now, a few position ideas I remember from the old days of sharing this info:
With you on your back, either lift your legs and drape them over his shoulders or lift them back toward your head. This permits deeper penetration. In fact, keeping your legs together is an additional technique that allows a little more of a tighter fit as well. Some find it even more effective to have a pillow or two comfortably placed under rear too.
During standard doggy or even doggy with her lying on her stomach, the technique of her legs being closed after penetration and during thrusting provides a tighter fit as well.
Woman superior is for YOUR benefit because it places you in fuller control. You control what happens, literally. You control how deep he goes, the angle, the grinding the thrusting (if able), everything. So keep that in mind if you choose that route again.
Here's a few links that I heard were pretty helpful when they shared in the past:
Size Matters
http://love.ivillage.com/lnssex/sexconcerns/0,,99bj,00.html
10 Hot New Sex Positions
http://magazines.ivillage.com/cosmopolitan/sex/no/articles/0,,166928_633458,00.html
5 Pleasure-Maxing Positions
http://magazines.ivillage.com/cosmopolitan/sex/no/articles/0,,166928_547497,00.html
Excellent and very fun positions we've learned from these articles, but don't forget your option to purchase some Kama Sutra material too. Kama Sutra is IMHO when it comes to searching for new positions, even ones designed for your very situation.
Good luck! :)
C H A R A C T E R
I'm curious. After reading your OP, and the replies and your subsequent comments.....how "small" is this guy? If he's your first partner, what are you basing your opinion on? Exactly what IS his size?
Also, have you ever thought that maybe you're very aroused, very well lubricated, and since there's not much feeling in the vagina, that you're just not "feeling" what's there?
He is 3 inches at the most!!!! You condsider that small, right? I have had oral sex with 3 other partners during my life. None of them were this small. I also know he is small b/c I can fit him in my mouth with no problems, while others may have gagged me.
He gets me very aroused and I get well lubricated. Should I not get so lubricated and maybe feel any difference?
3" erect? IF so, then yes, that is small for an adult male. However, that being said, your g-spot is only a couple of inches inside the vaginal opening, so he's actually the perfect length to directly stimulate that area with each thrust.
And IF you will wipe the extra lubrication away and keep the vestibule of your vagina drier for more friction, you might find that you feel much more than you thought you could. Most of our sensation is outside the vagina anyway.
But where there's a will, there's a way to manage almost any problem, sexual or otherwise.
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