Do you HAVE to shower before sex??

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2005
Do you HAVE to shower before sex??
24
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 5:10pm
i have this thing that i HaVE to shower before sex, otherwise i feel smelly and gross. i guess what started this was hearing guys talk about girls being nasty. because i have to bathe, i really cant have spontanous sex with my husband. does anyone else do this or do you have any suggestions for me?

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Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 5:44pm

Do I HAVE to shower before sex? No. Do I like to before having oral sex? Yes, if I can. But I also like my DH to be clean for that as well. I think that's just showing common courtesy for your partner. However, some men greatly enjoy a woman's natural aroma and prefer it to a soap smell.

I don't enjoy the smell of a dirty body anymore than the average person does, whether it's mine or DH's. HOWEVER, if you're allowing the insensitive remarks of random males to ruin your spontaneity with your hubby, then you're cheating him and yourself!

All that should matter to you is what your DH thinks and if he's fine with your natural aromas, then put those remarks in perspective and ignore what other men may think. I do.

As long as we bathe daily and practice general good hygiene, we're as clean as the next person. No extra cleaning or special attention needed simply because we're women though.

Don't allow these negative comments to affect how you feel about your natural body...you're giving WAY too much power to other people if you do.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 5:57pm

I'm a guy, and while I don't really feel the need for anyone to shower before intercourse, I have to admit that I do prefer my partner to have either showered or at least "freshened up" with a damp facecloth before oral sex. Likewise, I prefer to freshen up before fellatio. After a long busy day some areas get a bit whiffy and it's nice to have them cleaned if you're putting your face and mouth anywhere near them.

Guys in general might be more outspoken and rude about girls being "nasty" but I think if you hang around the boards here you'll get another perspective on the issue. There are plenty of guys that like the strong musky aroma of a healthy woman. I think that describing the odour as "nasty" is just typical male bravado and insensitivity, or it could reflect an unfortunate run-in with a yeast infection or something. I don't think that it's really the honest belief that most men have.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 6:00pm

I don't feel I need to shower before having sex.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2004
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 6:11pm
It is very very appropriate to shower before sex if possible, but too much of a good thing is bad too: my man is under strict instructions not to use soap to wash off his penis -- there's nothing that I find as intolerable as the taste, however faint, of soap on it. It will get clean enough if he just rinses it off, and it tastes much more normal.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2005
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 6:33pm

DW is obsessed with bathing or showering first. So much so that the sex often doesn't happen. The other day I managed to get her naked 6 hours after a bath and she had just mowed the lawn. Very musky. She refused to allow oral. But the sex was great...in part due to the odours.

My last GF didn't clean often enough...I didn't appreciate urine taste (oral) or feces odour (doggie style). She figured one shower a day with no soap "down there" was enough. Not true.

I don't let her go down there with her mouth unless I know I'm recently clean...she dated a few guys who were "gross" as she says...sometimes coming over to her place after sex with another woman but not even cleaning themselves.

I like a jacuzzi or hot-tub before oral but it interferes with lubrication forintercourse.

Big

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-12-2005
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 11:01pm
We like to take a shower and get all prepped up for sex. We've been doing it that way for years. That are a couple exceptions though. If we decide to have a quickie or if we sit in the jacuzzi first we don't bother with a shower. I like to feel clean and fresh so it's mostly my idea.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
Thu, 07-21-2005 - 11:46pm
No, I don't shower before sex....and I don't freshen up either. DH loves it that way (I have asked him) and it doesn't bother me in the slightest if he doesn't shower either.
Dress Up Games, Doll Makers and Cartoon Dolls @ The Doll Palace
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2003
Fri, 07-22-2005 - 12:21am

I had an ex who would call and tell me to take a shower before he came over. I started to think he had a bathrobe and wet hair fetish...Turns out he wanted me 'clean' - no matter how sweaty and smelling he was.

Yeah - he was strange.

Personally, I tend to freshen up a bit before because, with me, sex tends to be a little spontaneous. But if I KNOW for sure it's going to happen - I take a shower.

Blessings -

Liz

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 07-22-2005 - 1:46am
Unless you were a ditchdigger, at the end of a long day, when he called.....that would put me off sex personally.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2004
Fri, 07-22-2005 - 3:14am


You have written only about you, and not your man's preference - whether he likes you to shower or not. You will be surprised. If you ask me, please don't shower, whats the fun when I bury my face in DW's underarm and get soap instead of the woman-scent ? My nose just loves to roam into all the nooks and crannies, even down there at the backdoor too and I assure you it is not looking for soap.

Don't believe the guys who talk about girls being nasty. They are just show-offs (I bet these guys that you heard are just a memory of your teen years when you heard the boys gossiping).

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