Does he think I'm a sex fiend?
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| Wed, 04-27-2005 - 7:18pm |
I recently hooked up with a guy I've known casually for several months. Our relationship started with sex three weeks ago and has progressed nicely into exclusive dating, but we aren't introducing each other as boyfriend and girlfriend yet - at least I'm not. My friends mention my boyfriend and I'm quick to say, we're just seeing each other. He's a great date, perfect gentleman, a lot of fun, at ease as a "couple" in front of both our sets of friends - and I can see this possibly blossoming into a good relationship, even though in the past I have casually dated and always been skittish about being "in a couple." But for all my denying, that's essentially what we are.
Our sex life is quite regular - my two best friends have accused us of humping like rabbits. There's something about this guy that brings out a really wild side of me. He is European (Irish) and is very outgoing, uninhibited, and sexually charged, which really turns me on. He has casually remarked in bed about how horny I am and I'm afraid he may be seeing me as wildly permiscuous or some kind of sexual wildchild. I do enjoy sex very much but I'm doing new things - getting louder, talking dirty, encouraging crazy positions - all new for me but I don't want him to think I often engaged in wild, crazy casual sex before this relationship.
Can someone put me at ease about this relationship?

Three weeks of sex is not a relationship......yet. You say you've "progressed" into exclusive dating. Progressed? Have you discussed that, or are you assuming?
What is is that you need to be put at ease about? What do you care about what you did or didn't do in your past relationships, and what should he care about it? We all mature and progress sexually (or at least we should) and how adventurous you are now has no bearing on how you were last years, or 5 years ago. I doubt very much if he's ever given your prior relationships a thought......he's enjoying this sexual relationship and isn't concerned about whatever came before him.
I think you'd better slow down with the analyzing, and just enjoy this for what it is....and if you want more....then you need to discuss it with him, and make sure he wants more also. Do not assume anything.
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Why don't you feel @ ease if everything is consensual, you're having fun and you enjoy being with him?
Also why does it matter if he thinks you're a sex fiend? It's not like you're forcing him into something he doesn't want.
Sounds to me like you might be having issues with being a more powerful you! Word to the wise, in order to protect yourself from undo pain: Do not assume anything about the relationship - ask him his view so that you will always have a well-rounded perspective. Sex is great, but communcation is the key! Enjoy and relax!!!
Be true to yourself.