Does he want me to rim him?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2007
Does he want me to rim him?
5
Sun, 06-17-2007 - 10:51am
If my new boyfriend is rimming me, does that automatically mean he wants me to rim him?
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2006
Sun, 06-17-2007 - 11:58am
It doesn't automatically mean that, no. Some guys enjoy giving when it comes to anal play, but get a little freaked out at being on the receiving end. Have you asked him whether he'd like you to rim him?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-12-2006
Sun, 06-17-2007 - 1:29pm
Nothing is "automatic". Never assume anything, just ASK him! And if you don't want to do it, TELL him that.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2004
Sun, 06-17-2007 - 3:19pm

As the others have said, don't assume anything, nothing is automatic so you need to ask him.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-06-2005
Sun, 06-17-2007 - 10:47pm

well, I'm certainly an advocate of "everyone's different", but think about this:
1) Do you enjoy it when he rims you?
2) Did he ask you before doing it to you?
3) Did you ask him to do it to you?

IF he has no hang-ups about anal play, he's probably going to enjoy it. (If he DOES have a hang-up about anal play, he should get over it and learn to enjoy it, in my opinion!)

If you have a hang-up about doing it to him, I'd gently suggest getting over that, too. :)

Personally, I enjoy the reaction I get out of licking my GF's back-side, however, I found it somewhat difficult to ask for, myself..or more accurately, to let her know I'd probably really enjoy it if she did. Interestingly, she seems to have little problem with doing it to me, but rarely does it spontaneously. So much for mind reading! :)

so, yes, I agree with the "no, it isn't automatic that he wants it", but I'm not going to agree with the "wait for him to ask first" that might be implied. If you have no problem with it, do it, or at least, ask him if you think there is any possibility he might have a problem with it.

Shower together first, wash each other's backsides, and maybe even hint about what's about to happen to him if he shows no violent objections. :)

Note: I'm certainly not going to advocate licking the backside of any person you meet walking along the street, but if you have spent a fair amount of time together, the health risks are probably minimal, as you probably both would have long-ago contracted the same "problem" from an outside source... (i.e., yes, you can catch hepatitis et al. this way, but for you to catch it from him, he has to have it, and if he has it, he caught it somehow, and if you have spent a lot of time with him, you probably caught it from the same contaminated food at the same restaurant, or caught it in other ways from him already).

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2007
Mon, 06-18-2007 - 9:32am

Welcome to the board stink456.

I wonder if you would be comfortable trying while giving him a blow job. That would be a good time to judge his reaction. If he seems uncomfortable, back off and perhaps try another time, or use that time to ask him if he would like you to try again.

I don't think you can assume anything, but I don't necessarily think you need to ask about everything either. He may not even know how he would feel about it, but might discover he enjoys it as it happens.



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