Does size define masculinity?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2005
Does size define masculinity?
44
Sat, 10-29-2005 - 4:51pm

Several threads over the last 6 months have got me wondering:
Does size define a guy's masculinity?

If you'd answer yes, then how much weight would you attribute to this physical feature in how you view a guy's masculinity?

If you'd answer somewhat, then what weight would you attribute to a guy's size in your list of masculine attributes both physical and personal?

If you'd answer no, then what attributes both physical and personal do you define as being masculine?

Blonde

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2004
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 6:04pm

Been, is it being PC if what I say is true? Or is it only PC if I'm saying it not to offend?

I can only speak for myself, but masculinity has never been defined by me by penis size. I've had a few men that I had sex with before my husband and I've seen plenty of porn. When I see men in porn with large penises, I don't think...."Wow Macho!." When I judge a man's masculinity, I look at the man, his physique, the amount of hair on his body, his face, his voice, and his mannerisms--not his penis. How he treats me, his personality and how he makes me feel, are even larger factors in determining masculinity. Even if a man didn't have a penis, he could still be masculine in my eyes. With that aside, a man's penis is HIS pleasure tool, not mine(mine is incidental). The way he holds it, caresses it, and uses it to give him pleasure--now that's extremely manly. So it could be 2" or 10" they all work the same.

So, I'm not being PC when I say that size doesn't matter or that size doesn't correlate to masculinity, because it really doesn't. I'm not saying that so that I don't offend anyone, I'm saying that because I mean it from the very heart of me.

Imagination is more important than knowledge." (Albert Einstein )
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 6:30pm
It's a blurred term, but often politically correct people don't believe anyone really should be viewed as having an advantage over another, or that superficial difference shouldn't be paid attention to. For example, in it's extreme, some will even take issue with someone mentioning race when talking. If I were to say black women have bigger booties that I prefer, I will be considered a 'polite racist' by some because I mentioned what color when speaking about butts. Why couldn't I just say I like big butts. What difference does it make what color, so there point of view goes. And with the most extreme PCers some will even take some issue with me for putting emphasis on big butts and make sure to point out that all butts have fans and that we are all equal. Some PCers are more hardcore about it than others. If you truly don't thing bigger is better, than that is not being PC for you to say so. If you were to ignore any and all evidence that you may not be in a majority, that more than just a "few" can be 'superficial' and care about size, that all may not be equal in this world, then you are pc.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2004
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 7:01pm
I guess it's similar to breast size. There are some men who are indifferent to them or who prefer small breasts. They simply don't equate breast size to femininity, wherein other aspects of a woman do. No one questions a man, though. No one would accuse him of being in the minority or accuse him of being PC. So why can't a woman say that size doesn't matter or that size doesn't affect masculinity, without it being questioned or doubted? I just don't get it. ;-)
Imagination is more important than knowledge." (Albert Einstein )
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Thu, 11-03-2005 - 7:47pm
I believe a woman who says size doesnt matter, provided she doesn't contradict herself as in the example I gave. I could give numerous other examples of contradictory statements made. As in my example about breasts, if I contradicted myself (see example in previous my post) it would indicate I do think it matters afterall, at least a bit.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2005
Fri, 11-04-2005 - 1:05am
Hey West,
I wasn't speaking of columns but statues with huge erect penises. They were quite common in ancient Turkey for example. They even had a "god of love" whose penis was so large it held up a basket of fruit against his stomach. The female companions who were traveling with us all had to get one as a key ring to take home. It was humorous.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-20-2004
Fri, 11-04-2005 - 8:27am
Beenthere, If I remember my college classes ,while taking appreciation of art, most of those old cultures showed paintings and statues of women with large breasts. One thing I do know is that those really old cultures also idolized false gods and lived under superstitions. Im thinking that the statues with large penises were just cultures who believed what they believed out of ignorence and a faulty belief system.They didnt know any better. If what you are saying is true about modern society and penis size being an indicator of masculine men, then wouldnt it make sence that all men of power, wheather it be in politics, sports, business all would have big penises? You and I both know thats preposterous. Most people wear clothes, so know one knows. Most women have made up their mind wheather a man is "masculine" enough for them before the cloths come off. If she shuns him because of a small penis, its not because he was not masculine enough, its because ,during sex she prefers a larger penis.
Think of jobs that require a "masculine" type of guy, Bullriders, linebackers, iron workers...Not once does their penis size come into play in the preception of their masclinity.
My point earlier was that people thousands of years ago believed in all kinds of irrational thinking and a large penis is one of them..Todays people can/ should be above such primitive thinking.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-15-2003
Fri, 11-04-2005 - 10:14am

Hi Blonde,

Just and FYI concerning statues etc. Statues with the enormous erect phallus were spiritual symbols of potency etc. they were archetypes and no one expected that the penis was some side ideal. Just like in early religious sculptures, the goddess mothers were usually depicted with enormous hips, belly and breasts...they represented the female/mother aspect of the Universe. Large breasts were a symbol of nurturing and the larger hips a symbol of creativity. These were not meant to be taken literally rather they were meant as symbology.

If you view more realistic statues of the Greeks and Romans, you will notice the the depiction of both breasts on women and penis' on men are more proportional.

Thanks,
Scott.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-20-2004
Fri, 11-04-2005 - 11:19am
Scott you are right....Thinking of the statue of David, he looks pretty masculine and he has a smaller penis..lol
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2005
Fri, 11-04-2005 - 5:52pm

Your question has made me wonder about something, whether if it could help explain (or perhaps not), or at least partially explain something that is a bit puzzling to me.

I'm about 6'1" tall, weight 200 lbs, with broad shoulders and a bit fuller butt, and bigger more solid pecs, than the average male. Some ladies look at one or the other or all on me. That's nowdays. There was a time I was thin as can be, my shoulders didn't look as wide. My chest was there some, but not like today. I do exercise a bit nowadays, whereas I didn't back then. Back then I looked smallish in body, and I know that I didn't physically look all that good to the vast majority of women. I received hardly any looks from women (there were times I did though, but it was unusual), even though 6'1" tall. When I put on weight and filled out it changed, and I began getting quite a number of double takes and smiles.

But even after I filled out, I still had no bulge in my pants' crotch. I didn't have much of a flaccid size, hanging about 2 1/2" non bone pressed (just measuring to the skin and not including the fatpad) limp by a bit smaller around (girth) than most guys. I finally learned of penis enlargement exercises a few years ago (been more seriously into it for only about 2 years though), and nowadays my flaccid (limp)is about 4 3/4" non bone pressed, and a bit thicker, and hopefully will continue to grow even though my gains have slowed down (I realise many don't believe in penis enlargement exercises, and I'm only bringing up pe so that my story can be complete).

Now that I have this size flaccid, it's creates a bulge in my pants. I have a pair of blue jeans that really emphasises it more than my other clothes. Now women still give me looks sincei've filled out in body, but in addition I'm getting even more looks, as some women are crotch watchers. And sometimes women that weren't even crotch watching, but were just looking at me like women did after I gained weight before I developed a bulge, often those women will suddenly notice I my bulge now and many times I've had them obviously, suddenly, intensify their interest in me. Not always, but it happens fairly often.

At the beginning of this post, I said that something was puzzling me, and that perhaps or perhaps not this thread may offer a clue, at least partially. See, I realise that bulge watching doesn't automatically equate with caring about size. There are enough women that say that for me to understand that that is possible, even though at first the connection of an attraction of a big bulge to caring about size for sex seems logical.

There are indeed plenty women that will state they love the sight of a big dick, but don't want it for sex. Is it a masculinity connection inborn into their DNA, that makes them psychologically attracted to a big dick, even though they have come to realise they don't prefer it during sex. This same attraction for big dicks causes them to find a nice size bulge in a guy's pants appealing looking. He's got a bigger bulge than guys have, his shows, and therefore he's got something down there. I know about the belief that a bigger bulge doesn't representent bigger dick to women, as women are said to understand that small flaccids catch up with longer flaccds when both become erect (growers vs showers). Even if a woman believes that (some do, some don't), the visual representation of bigness still gets her interest, even when it's just a big flaccid. (I'm not wanting to open up the can of worms about whether growers do indeed catch up with showers when they both become erect. For the record though, I've studied this and the truth is, just in general, with plenty of exceptions, growers overall gain ground, but don't catch up, despite popular belief).

One more thing. While I'm at it about bulges, I might as well mention this. It's just an observation. It's not meant as some ugly racial spew. Whether you agree with my posts at this forum or not, I think you see I'm analytical by nature. I'm also very observant of my surroundings. Ok, this concerns bulges, and has raised my curiosity. Now that I have a bulge I've been noticing that many black women will look and look. It's a very sexual vibe/look I often receive from them. Some white ladies will glance quickly a couple of times (some becoming embarrassed if I catch them), a few look, and a very few stare. But with the black ladies they look, not glance, and if they see me looking they don't avert their eyes. They look as much as they please, and will look me dead in the face with interest in their expression. I've got good hearing and as I'm walking away I've heard some black ladies say they wonder if they could "get some of that". I've also heard a few start saying they didn't know white guys had anything down there (sorry, I know that is blunt, I'm just telling it as is). I was followed around a store by three white ladies one time, and I heard one of them say she couldn't stop thinking about it enough to shop. I've only this happen once, but one black woman on purposely stopped in front of me and bent over pressing herself into me as she acted like she was looking at an item on the bottom shelf. If I wasn't married, to be honest I might have grapped her and gone to a motel with her, as her pressing that big round bubble butt into me did turn me on.

So I'm getting the impression that more black women in general care about bigger than average than white women do, even though I do think more white women care than this than most on this forum tend to. I don't know if bulges are being equated with masculinity or not. I don't think bulge interest always equates with caring about erect size for sex, but I strongly suspect a correlation is there.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Fri, 11-04-2005 - 11:55pm

>>I wasn't speaking of columns but statues with huge erect penises.<<

Oh, Ok ;-)

A bowl of fruit, eh?

I've seen some of these statues somewhere or on something or in something somewhere before. Some civilisations weren't shy about their penises! In that situation, yeah, I think that it is plainly obvious that they had a thing about penises. What exactly it was I'm not sure though. Was it masculinity or was it fertility? And even if they used a large penis as a symbol of power and defined masculinity by size, did they worry about it day-to-day or was it a more obscure concept in society? Many of these people didn't have a written language so were the carvings and statues just being very clear in indicating that the figure depicted was male, or were they conveying his enormous "masculinity" to the observer? It's all very complicated when you start getting into it.