Double standards

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2004
Double standards
44
Fri, 05-21-2004 - 2:46pm
Because of the responces to this comment about double standards between men and women, I figured I would start a thread on it.

Do you believe a double standard exists about sexuality of men and women?

What do you feel is the cause of this double standard?

Would you find it harder to believe a man or a woman who cried Rape??? (for your benefit Tish. He He)

And last, if your mate complained that you were not doing something that they really enjoyed, how much of your own opinion on it would you bring to the conversation, and would you expect your partner to give up something they really liked because you didn't??

Any other comments/questions are welcome. I don't like the double standards in sexuality but I have no choice but to accept them as they are.

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: jeephead
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 4:13pm
Excuse me? Have YOU ever served during a war? Do you know firsthand what the experience is like?

And yes, most of the men and women serving on the ground ARE children, basically! We're talking about 18-21 yr. olds for the most part!

My son just got out of the Navy after 6 yrs. and he served in the Persian Gulf last year. He SAW people killed. My nephew just got back from Iraq, serving as a medic and is now overcoming all he's seen and done. And they BOTH will tell you that women are everywhere in the military and are being shot at with the same bullets and ARE in harm's way everyday.

Like it or not, without women in the military, serving in various capacities, we wouldn't have enough soldiers to protect our own borders, much less our interests elsewhere in the world.

And absolutely nurses should be given their due! If they're in country during a war, they're in danger!






Edited 5/25/2004 5:46 pm ET ET by katmandoo2001

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2003
In reply to: jeephead
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 4:31pm
"snippy"? Are you playing a pun off of my haircutting talents? ;-)

I merely responded to a statement made by another poster that I felt needed addressing, just as you responded to a similar comment...made by the same poster.

Avatar for sugarbeat
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: jeephead
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 4:36pm
>>So you feel that only those women who contribute financially deserve respect?

You are completely misquoting me. I believe both women who work outside and inside of the home deserve respect.

I agree that having a family is a team effort.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2004
In reply to: jeephead
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 4:36pm
When you said "Why do you think I care what you think?" it was posted to my username, so I thought it was directed to me. My mistake.

Leticia

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2003
In reply to: jeephead
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 5:05pm
It was directed at you. I just wanted to be free to speak my mind, which I thought was odd, since your response to the same poster was very similar to mine.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2004
In reply to: jeephead
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 5:32pm
Then I didn't misunderstand you, you were being snippy. Sayin "Why do you think I care what you think?" isn't hard to get the gist of ;o) I had no intention of trying to keep you from speaking your mind. I am not sure how saying that I think you misuderstood sugar meant that I was trying to zip your lips, how you jumped to that conclusion I don't know. I simply was asking Sugar for clarification, but from your wording it came across as you being put off by what she wrote. I mean, you started your post with "So you feel that only those women who contribute financially deserve respect?" You sounded insulted. I was simply trying to avoid turning this thread into a debate about SAHM.

Leticia

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: jeephead
Tue, 05-25-2004 - 5:44pm
I actually don't believe that many husbands completely respect what stay-at-home moms do UNTIL they have to take on the role themselves for some reason! THEN, they understand that that responsibility requires so much more than a single job does. Then, their perception is changed forever.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2004
In reply to: jeephead
Wed, 05-26-2004 - 10:06am
Kat, For your information, I have served in several combat zones, many different situations. I was in situations that would make your hair fall out. I am sorry to hear about your son and nephew having to see the things they saw. It has probably scared them much deeper than they realize. I know it did me. Three years of nightmares, waking up in cold sweats, fighting off enemies in my sleep, and actually throwing my wife at the time out of bed. It was not a good experience for me, and I take great offense to your questioning on this. War zone??? No, I have never served in a war zone. I have never seen action in a war. What I have done is conflicts. Basically the exact same thing, only this one doesn't have congressional backing. Bosnia, Kosavo, Iran, Guatemala, Columbia. Just to name a few. You have twisted a lot of what I have said. I am not talking down about nurses in country, or nurses in the combat tents. Yes, unfortunately women are everywhere in the military these days. If it were not for women in the military, we would just have the draft reinstated sooner. No biggie to me, as I am still inactive ready reserve. Ready to serve my country if they require it. WHAT I MEANT BY NOT TALKING ABOUT CHILDREN, WAS WERE NOT TALKING ABOUT OUR OWN CHILDREN. I was un aware of your sons presence in our nations military. For that I give him much respect, and hope his time in did him well, and did not throw large wrenches into his life. Your nephew will take a while to get back to normal, but eventually his life will also repair and he will move on. He gets my undieing gratitude for his sacrifice, commitment, and courage. Please, do not mock me, or doubt me. I know there pain, first hand, And just because I worked with Spec Ops, and Secret Srevice, does not mean I was above the danger or the risks. They are necessary risks, at times, and others they are not. It all depends on how your son and nephew feel about it, and there views of our roll in this war. I hope all goes well for them, and wish them nothing but best.


Edited 5/26/2004 10:14 am ET ET by jeephead
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2004
In reply to: jeephead
Wed, 05-26-2004 - 10:13am
When I was unemployed I took care of my kids, and my SO went to work. Yes, my perception changed. Comparitively I would much rather be at work all day long, doing something constructive, rather than trying to keep up with a two year old all day long, and having little else to do. The house work was done by 9, lunch at 12:30, Nap at 1, and my day was gone. So, new perspective, oh hell yeah. Would I do it again? Yes, I would, but only if I had no other choice. Did I enjoy the time I got to spend with my Daughter? Of course, but she drove me up the wall, constantly and all I prayed for was to get back to work. I am not cut out to be a full time nanny. I am the father, which means I get the joyfull responsibility in my mind to provide for them, and when I was not doing my part, I got very depressed, so much so that it effected everything in my life. It was not good. I belong at work. I am a man.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
In reply to: jeephead
Wed, 05-26-2004 - 12:02pm

Well Jeep, I was agreeing with your post till you got to the last line.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd