Exit Only!!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-21-2005
Exit Only!!!!
13
Wed, 06-22-2005 - 6:38pm

Wow how do I start this topic? It's about having sex in the ass or licking ass (aka tossing salad) I know that this is perfectly normal for some but for others like myself I have a hard time with this issue because of all the taboos i hear about the butt, Some being .. squeamishness, cleanliness and health issues ...ect., I often talk to my friends about this issue and most maybe all says that they love the feeling and most of time they won't have sex with out it. Now don't get me wroge I have tried it once but to tell you the truth it hurt like hell and it felt like i was about to poop lol. These feelings I was having placed my fear in me .. After all the pain I mad up my mind and came up with my own saying " EXIT ONLY DO NOT ENTER" . I want to be able to over come this fear I have and some what enjoy the sensation and pleasures that I hear so much about. Question how can I make this very pleasurable for both myself and my partner?

Thank You
Exit only!

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Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: tabbs077
Wed, 06-22-2005 - 6:50pm

Tabbs, no one can tell you how to make this activity less uncomfortable for you. That's up to you, starting with a change in your thinking about it. Maybe you felt pressured to do it the first time before you were sure how you felt about it.

But IF you want to overcome your distaste, then all you can do is try to relax and take baby steps the next time. And just because others enjoy a certain activity, doesn't mean that you must learn to. We all have our personal boundaries and feelings and they should be respected. However, the more you do anything typically, the more comfortable and relaxed you should become with it.

But if anal continues to be painful, then you shouldn't keep trying to do it. You can do damage to your rectal tissues if you aren't fully relaxed and willing.

As for me, it's not my cup of tea and thankfully, it's not my DH's either!




Edited 6/22/2005 6:58 pm ET ET by katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
In reply to: tabbs077
Wed, 06-22-2005 - 9:07pm

Dh and I enjoy anal sex on occasion, it's not something we do all the time.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-21-2005
In reply to: tabbs077
Wed, 06-22-2005 - 11:16pm
I now understand that if and when I do have
anal sex i need to be 100% comfortable and relaxed, and also getting my mind in a different state other than pain.
Thank you so much for your advice.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-06-2004
In reply to: tabbs077
Fri, 06-24-2005 - 6:16pm
This is funny, my bf should read this...i am just not an ass person...i mean my ass, i'm just not comfortable with the whole idea...so my bf and i got into a fight about something else and basically after saying no no no forever, i gave in to please him...one pump was all i could take before i bursted into tears from the fricking pain that it caused...it was worst than loosing my virginity! 10x more sore to me...but the hard part was he really wants it, he has heard lots of good from it...and he likes porn and it doesn't help with all those girls just taking it and loving it...but then i tell him look how stretched out their holes are...its not supposed to be like that...One of my friends friends said you can't control your crap after, my guess is because those muscles are so loose after so many times...I am willing to try it one more time, but i'd recommend pain killers before and alcohol...majorly...well at least for me...But if you try it, don't double dip...i mean that is the easiest way to get a UTI and a bad one i'm sure...I actually have chronic UTIS because my bladder hates me, so that also makes me scared to try that...plus i have always believed in it being an exit only hole...the things we do for love!
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
In reply to: tabbs077
Fri, 06-24-2005 - 6:24pm

Pain killers, alcohol, etc. are NOT recommended for anal sex.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2004
In reply to: tabbs077
Fri, 06-24-2005 - 9:47pm
If it hurts, then chances are it isn't being done correctly. Ya need tons of lube and to be completely relaxed.
I, myself, am sometimes incapable b/c I'm too uptight (no pun intended) about cleanliness. When it comes to hygeine, I like to be squeaky clean. So, I'll sit there and worry about whether I'm clean. I can't relax. Its all about finding the right position, too. I'd start off light..Like with a finger. Then work it to two..Then add in a toy-vibe or dildo. Then work to full penetration with his penis. But, move at a pace that's comfy to you. If you're not ready, don't rush it. He'll understand I'm sure.
Its good if done right. If not, its no good at all. Take things at YOUR own pace. And have fun with it, too! Maybe he'd enjoy a little play back there, too?! ;)
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2005
In reply to: tabbs077
Sat, 06-25-2005 - 9:17pm
I thin k the best way to make it easier for you and your partner is to get ANAL EASE have him put it on you and let it sit ther for 2 min. while it is numbing the area you can give him a blowjob. When you feel ready put a pillow under your breasts and put your chin on it, have him slowly very slowly enter and then he will be in you, it feels great after he is done he can lick your ass and it will taste good the important thing to remember is to buy a flavor that he will like. I have cherry flavor. trust me it works and he will enjoy it.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
In reply to: tabbs077
Sat, 06-25-2005 - 9:28pm
Analease is not recommended because it does numb the area.

bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

Avatar for incognito_mosquito
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to: tabbs077
Sun, 06-26-2005 - 2:43am
I really love anal sex, but for me it hurts if we don't take the time to stretch me out properly first. We start with a small/narrow vibrator, then use a bigger one before penetration, and use lots of lube for all of them. I like things that vibrate for this because the vibrations sort of help your muscles relax down there.
Avatar for incognito_mosquito
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
In reply to: tabbs077
Sun, 06-26-2005 - 2:52am

"One of my friends friends said you can't control your crap after, my guess is because those muscles are so loose after so many times."

I do anal on a fairly regular basis, and this is not true at all. I haven't had any issues with constipation thogh, I will say that.

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