feeling up

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2005
feeling up
20
Mon, 08-15-2005 - 5:50pm
my boyfriend is old fashion, and hes not really sure how to feel me up or how to go about doing it and Iam not sure how I can explain it to him..please help...

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Mon, 08-15-2005 - 7:08pm

It might not be that he's old fashioned, he might just not know what you like.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Mon, 08-15-2005 - 7:50pm

How old are you?

I doubt that he's having problems because he's "old fashioned" because they invented sex years ago too. People have been managing to figure out what to do for years and years before you and I were around.

I would hazard a guess that it's more likely that he simply hasn't had much experience in "feeling people up".

The simplest way to help him figure out what to do is to show him. Ask him to touch you. Then take his hand in yours, and move it to where you want it. Guide his fingers and tell him what you want at the same time. Basic instructions like "Yeah. Just curl your fingers there." or "Mmmmm. Rub gently there." will help him understand what exactly you are trying to show him.

Just remember that even if he had had lots of experience in feeling people up different girls would have wanted and preferred different techniques. So you would really need to show him what YOU like, even if he was confident about what he thought he was doing.

Communication is key if you are going to get 110% out of the experience. You can lie there hoping that he'll get it right, or you can show and tell him how you like it. And vice versa, ask him what he likes too.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2005
Mon, 08-15-2005 - 9:15pm
thanxs soo much!! Oh, and Iam 21....
Avatar for elainetwirl
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-01-2003
Tue, 08-16-2005 - 9:54am
Wow, I thought I had experienced just about everything, but I have never come across a male who does not know how to feel me up. While most of them improve with age and experience, even when I was teenager and oh-so-prim the boys seemed to know what to do. What males aren't good at is knowing how and where to touch, and that is something you can teach him. Elaine
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2005
Tue, 08-16-2005 - 9:19pm
We tried it last night, and he told me that he was scared that he was gonna hurt my breast....how can I help him not be scared??
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Tue, 08-16-2005 - 9:32pm

Just take his hand and put it where you want it, move it how you want it, tell him what to do, it you want him to play with your nipples, squeeze them, suck then, lick then, whatever it you want, let him know.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2005
Tue, 08-16-2005 - 10:32pm
I told him that I would tell him if it hurts, and I tried guiding him with my hand, but he freaked and told me he wanted to do it himself. Everytime we've fooled around, he never would touch them, and now that I brought it up, he's either scared or dont know how about doing it..
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Wed, 08-17-2005 - 12:33am

Well, if he wants to do it himself......

There's something more going on here but I can't quite put my finger on it. No wonder you're confused. The guy doesn't know what he wants. I guess that you'll just have to see how it goes for a while. Keep talking to him if necessary, and honestly, the odd comment here and there and the occasional gentle direction with your hand shouldn't make him freak out.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-11-2004
Wed, 08-17-2005 - 7:26am

Hi elainetwirl:

A guy DOESN'T automatically know how to feel up a woman. EACH woman will teach the guy to be a better lover.

Macman04

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Wed, 08-17-2005 - 7:48am

You said every time you fooled around, he would never touch your breasts and he's scared or afraid of hurting you.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

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