The First Time

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2004
The First Time
1
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 3:44pm

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Nevermind

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Edited 2/4/2006 5:48 pm ET by angelinajar
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-26-2005
Sat, 02-04-2006 - 4:09pm

Of course he was nervous! Having had previous experience means nothing. Every new partner is a NEW experience, and the fact that you're a virgin made him even more nervous. Were you using a condom? Sometimes that bothers guys, too. Even experienced men, with experienced women lose their erections occasionally. That's not at all unusual. Should you have helped him? I don't know. You didn't, so don't worry about it. Should you say something about it, NO! He knows what happened, he knows you know what happened, and bringing it up will just make it more of a problem. If he starts worrying about it, it will just get worse.

I don't understand what you mean "we got disconnected". Do you mean he came out of you? That's what will happen if a guy loses his erection.

You've only known this guy a VERY short time, and there's no rush! If he has problems again, just reassure him that it's ok.......it'll be better next time.

Having a "large" sex drive doesn't mean you have to have intercourse, either. For most women, intercourse is just a part of sex....and not even the major part. Your vagina isn't your main sexual organ. Your clitoris is, and you will get more pleasure and satisfaction from oral or manual stimulation of your clitoris than you will from intercourse. For guys, it's intercourse.....for women, it's lots of foreplay, and then finishing with intercourse for his pleasure. I'm not saying intercourse isn't good..but it's nowhere near the pleasure you get from clitoral stimulation.

Just take your time. If you haven't already, set up a gyno visit and get yourself on some kind of birth control......have him get tested for STD's....and then you won't need condoms, which will probably help him. You have a whole lifetime ahead of you to have sex.....there's no rush to "get it over with".