first time good?
Find a Conversation
first time good?
| Wed, 08-24-2005 - 11:47am |
I have heard so many stories of the first time sex being bad, if they had sex for the first time when still a teenager. Did anyone lose their virginity when 16 or 17 years old and if so was it a good experience? I want to hear stories where you don't regret it and it was a good choice. Also, if this happened, did you talk about sex with your partner before? What did you do to prepare?

Pages
Kara-
My first experience was somewhat off. I didn't really have a choice in the matter. But I was 17.
Shortly there after (at 17)...when I actually choose to have sex...I thought that it was wonderful, for the body, mind, relationship, and everything else. I definately was "glowing." As long as you lose your virginity to someone that you care about and cares about you...there should be no regrets. I wish my second experience had been my first. But I consider it as such because I don't remember my first.
Kayla
It SHOULD be good, but it won't be if neither of you knows what you're doing. And at 16, neither of you knows what you're doing.
Kara, if you read the rules above, you are too young to be posting here. We aren't allowed to tell a 16 year old about sexual things. That's up to your parents to do.
iVillage has teen boards that would be much better for you!
I agree. But at the same time...high school wasn't too long ago for me...and I know for a fact that they are well beyond parents telling them anything. They need REAL advice. I'm glad she asked. But your right...a teen site is more appropriate.
Or she might have been asking for a conversation starter...
Kayla
I gave up my virginity at 16 and even though I came to regret it later, overall, it wasn't a bad experience. It was painful and not too exciting but I didn't expect it to be either. I knew the first time would be a learning experience.
But I made the choice to do it after talking at length with my long time BF, over a period of time. There was no pressure from him whatsoever. And we prepared by having condoms available and spending a LOT of time in foreplay.
But you simply cannot appreciate how much you will change from age 16 to 21 and making THAT choice, at that young age wasn't the best decision for me, in hindsight.
Edited 8/24/2005 3:00 pm ET ET by katmandoo2001
Rules are rules, you have to be 18 to post here.
I know for a fact my parents would have talked to me about anything I wanted...and would have given me the most honest answer they could. My mom even showed me how to put a condom on. But the simple fact is...I didn't want my parents advice, and most of the things they said, I ignored. It was the mind frame of a 16 year old girl. "Your parents are too old, and don't know what they are talking about."
Now, I call my mom about anything and everything. She's my best friend.
I do agree this isn't a site for a 16 year old.
Kayla
I do respectfully disagree with you on that. I know what the rules are. ( I know that I didn't find out about ivillage until after I turned 21, so I wasn't affected by any rules on age limits.) However, I never found the teen boards to be of much help to myself at that age when I had questions. (Not that my parents were of any help either.) If I had a question about sex, I'd run next door and ask the sorority girls in the house there. I learned a lot more accurate information from them than I did from boards like YM,Scarleteen and others. I feel that teens could learn a lot from us on this board.
Just my 2cents.
I understand that perfectly well (the possibility of lawsuits and all.) Still, I don't agree with the way things are.....just a difference of opinion.
I do wonder how boards such as Scarleteen and YM and others get around the "delinqency of a minor" thing. The people on those boards talk about sex just as much as we do here. I don't see a difference to be honest.
Edited 8/25/2005 8:55 pm ET ET by shaynamadelah44
>>Or she might have been asking for a conversation starter...<<
That's true I suppose.
I'd like to think that if it was my 16 year old daughter considering loosing her virginity that she'd be doing it with a sensible and mature guy that really likes her, and values the relationship that he has with her. I'd also hope that she could easily talk to him about sex. I think the last thing that you'd want her to do is make the decision by herself and just "give in" to his advances without having first talked to him and involved him in the decision. You'd want her to have talked to him about it, discussed STD's and birthcontrol, and to have both agreed on how and when the deed is to be done. Hopefully they'll be able to take their time, without any pressure, and spend lots of time getting to know one another's bodies before trying intercourse. It'd be good if he listened to her too and if it wasn't going well, to slow down and maybe even try another time.
I mean, it doesn't have to be a painful or bad experience. But if you just lie there and haven't talked about it and you both fumble around in the dark, then yeah, it's not going to be as pleasant as you might have liked.
Pages