First time nerves
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First time nerves
| Fri, 08-12-2005 - 6:10pm |
How nervous were you the first time you had intercourse? And is there any way to not be nervous at all and totally relax?
| Fri, 08-12-2005 - 6:10pm |
My first time I wasn't nervous at all, he was
Unless you're not sure you should be doing it, there's no reason to BE nervous. And if you're not sure, then don't do it. Don't do it because your partner wants you to.....only do it if YOU want to. Nervousness, and not being relaxed makes it difficult, and not a very pleasant experience. Nervousness makes you tight, and dry....and it can be painful. If you're well lubricated, and well aroused and relaxed, it should be a good experience.
Also, since you're specifying "intercourse", then hopefully, you've done other things together, you're familiar with each other's bodies, and there won't be any big surprises. If you haven't done any touching or fondling......haven't been "naked" together, then you should do those things for a while before attempting intercourse. If you HAVE been doing those other things (known as foreplay), then intercourse shouldn't be a big deal....it's just one more sexual thing to do, and nothing to be nervous about. Get on a good method of birth control & either both of you get tested, or use condoms, and you won't have to worry about pregnancy or diseases.
Just remember, when in doubt, don't. I've never heard anyone say they're sorry they waited, but LOTS of women say they're sorry they DIDN'T wait.
Good Luck!
I personally feel the only way to "not" be nervous is to go that nervous stage first. Honestly, its a whole new experience and there is NO certainty of what to expect, both physically as well as the response of the other partner.
I would think that being nervous is just THAT natural and am not sure there is really any NEED to not be nervous. If its true love, then just let the butterflies fly and let it all happen. Its the most fantastic intimate union, so let it be what it will the first time; DON'T expect or demand perfection. Let the first time be a "hello" to each other's bodies and extra step in that relationship and THEN let the enjoyment just "grow" more and more after that.
We all have our different aspects on it, but thats one right there that quite a few of us share anyway.
C H A R A C T E R
We were already doing everything but intercourse when I had my first experience. I was completely ready to take the relationship to the next level and had no regrets at all. Lucky for me, my partner was more experienced and was very gentle. I knew I could trust him and it just felt right to be with him.
One way to relax is to get to know the other person well enough that you're comfortable in the situation. Another is depending on your age, have a drink. I have to admit though, I was 16 when I had intercourse and I was high on hormones. LOL!