The first time is over with, kind of :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2003
The first time is over with, kind of :)
3
Tue, 06-22-2004 - 9:38pm
I'm in a long distance relationship and last month we kind of had sex for the first time. He was about halfway in and I didn't feel any pain while he was entering, but when he started moving back and forth it hurt a lot and I had to ask him to stop. I got on top then and it was better as long as I didn't try to get him in any farther. And then I was soooo sore the next 2 days.

What can I do to make it less painful during our next visit? It is kind of hard dealing with this long distance. Despite the two months in between, will it still go easier next time? Or do you have to do it all the time to keep things comfortable? Also I'm kind of wondering why it wouldn't go in any more. I had a checkup and the doctor said I have no hymen.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Tue, 06-22-2004 - 10:00pm

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bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-18-2001
Tue, 06-22-2004 - 10:50pm
I'll just add that it's more than likely that your vaginal and abdominal muscles were very tense in anticipation and that's what prevented him going in very far. Especially if you expected it to hurt. We all tense up if we expect something to hurt or to be uncomfortable. Not something that you have a great deal of concious control over but with once you get used to it you'll relax and be able to enjoy yourself.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-27-2004
Tue, 06-22-2004 - 11:52pm
You were nervous. You didn't have enough foreplay. That made you too tight, and too dry. THAT made it painful. Next time, take more time for foreplay...and make SURE you're fully aroused. If you're not lubricated enough, then use some KY or Astroglide.

No, you don't have to do it constantly to make it comfortable. But, if you do it more often, which you can't, you'll get over the nervousness faster. Once you're comfortable with sex, you can wait 10 years, and it will be no different than if you'd done it the day before, UNLESS of course, you're nervous.