Frequency of sex and age

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2004
Frequency of sex and age
4
Thu, 10-21-2004 - 10:30am

I know there are lots of articles/discussions about age and frequency of sex but I thought I'd pose the question to the readers here. Do many of you find that on average your frequency of sex has decreased as you've gotten older? I know that for the first five years of our relationship (we've been together for 21 years) dh and I couldn't keep our hands (and anything else!) off each other. We had sex 10-20 times a week. The only time we took a break was when I had my period and that didn't always stop us. Since then, with jobs and kids our frequency steadily declined and has been stable at about 2-3 times per week for the past five years (we are both in our early forties). Recently (since the beginning of the summer) we've bounced back up to at least once a day. I was just curious what other peoples experiences were.

org

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2004
Thu, 10-21-2004 - 10:35am
we have gone from a few times a week, when we first lived together, to once a month or less, when the kids were little, to almost every day now that they are a little older.
Im 41 dh is 43 and we've been together 20 years (married 17)
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2004
Thu, 10-21-2004 - 11:38am

I'm 46 and Dh is 49.


bounxh0a-1.gif picture by dillbyrd

Avatar for katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 10-21-2004 - 11:38am

Yep, what you described sounds pretty similar to what my (and probably most couples) experience has been in marriage. My DH and I have been married almost 28 yrs. and we averaged 3-4 times a week for years (after our children started school) and now, as empty nesters, we're back to 5-6 times a week. I think it tends to correlate with your other responsibilities, children, privacy, health, etc. and many other factors. As you get older, you tend to have more time to yourselves again. The desire may ALWAYS be there but often the time and energy simply aren't.

And my DH and I have compared our sex life at present, to our first years together, and agree that it's so much more satisfying now. Maybe we just appreciate it, and each other more, I don't know.




Edited 10/21/2004 12:01 pm ET ET by katmandoo2001
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2004
Thu, 10-21-2004 - 12:28pm
Thanks for your comments. I totally agree with the you and the previous posters about the quality of sex as I've gotten older. Yes, when I was in my twenties I seemed to have sex at every opportunity - and for the most part it was really good. However now, even with far less frequency the times we do have sex are really, really great. A combination of really understanding your partner and yourself. I would easily select sex in my forties over sex in my twenties.