The funniest thing to happen during sex?

Avatar for guyfromjersey
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2004
The funniest thing to happen during sex?
17
Mon, 12-05-2005 - 2:12pm

I'm sure we have all had funny things occur during sex, not all of which were probably funny at the time but may now seem hilarious...or just amusing. This can be from any place, any time, any kind of sex, with a current or previous partner...or even when you were masturbating.

My story is when my wife was giving me a BJ at her sister's apartment (her sister was away) with her sister's dog was sleeping several feet from the bed. As a gag, when I came my wife aimed my penis towards the dog and I ended up hitting the dog not once, not twice, but three times on successive spurts. The dog woke up just as the third spurt landed and the dog literally didn't know what had hit him and then started running around in circles trying to find the source of the mystery semen. It had to be one of the funniest things the two of us had ever seen.

What's your favorite funny story involving sex?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-20-2004
Sat, 12-10-2005 - 6:53am
once I was on top, and supporting my weight on "straight" arms..As I was about to come, I wanted to hold her close, So I quickly lowered myself so we were chest to chest....In doing so I banged my head really hard on the edge of the headboard...Strange sensation, a lot of pain and the pleasure of orgasm at the exact same time.. I really did see stars when I hit my head...a little blood and a lot of laughter.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-20-2004
Sat, 12-10-2005 - 6:58am
Once a gf was giving me a bj on the outerbelt, not many cars around...I look over and a work van pulled up beside us(a van with only the driver window, no other windows on his side)..I drove a little faster cause I was about to finish, so he wouldnt see..I look over again and out of the drivers window was 4 heads straning to get a good look, I came and started laughing...I never told her why I was laughing.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2004
Sat, 12-10-2005 - 7:31pm

I was dating this woman one time and after we had gone to dinner we came back to her place. We started kissing and one thing let to another and she started giving me a bj in her living room. This was only our second date so I really didn't know her all that well. Her phone rings and it gets picked up by her answering machine. The message being left while she was giving me a bj was from another guy she had recently gone out with saying that he would like to see her again...blah, blah, blah.

The message really didn't really bother. I thought it was kind of funny.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-14-2005
Wed, 12-14-2005 - 5:57am
I find it funny but my husband has a different opinion. One time I was giving my huband a bj and at the time I was upset with about something. So it was angry blowing to begin with. Anyway I could tell he was getting ready to come so I finished with my hand cause I was too mad to take it. Well unfortunaltely for my husband he looked down just in time to get a shot in the eye. I really didn't mean to do it but I wasn't mad at him anymore after that. He still gets mad at me about it.
Avatar for guyfromjersey
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2004
Wed, 12-14-2005 - 6:57am
I once had a girlfriend who did almost the exact same thing...to herself...ending with a handjob and getting shot in her face. She got real mad, saying "you almost got me in the eye"...but she was the one doing the aiming, as best as one can aim an ejaculating penis. When I later told GF#2 about GF#1 getting shot in the eye (this was after I'd broken up with #1) GF#2 thought it was the funniest thing she'd ever heard (she hated #1).
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-14-2005
Wed, 12-14-2005 - 12:59pm

After getting intimate with my GF's kitty, while cleaning up I noticed I had a bloody nose. At first I thought she "started" and I was grossed out, but it was all my nose.

Since then I won't go downstairs with the lights off!!

Good lesson learned!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2006
Fri, 04-28-2006 - 2:43pm
One time when my girlfriend and I started having intercourse on her bed, her cat was still sitting on the bed, she looked at us strangely and after a few minutes jumped down off the bed. If her cat was on the bed when were in bed together and I happened to be stroking her breast when we were laying like spoons, she would slap her paw at my hand and I would laugh. Her cat gets jealous!

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