Gawking!
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Gawking!
| Thu, 11-18-2004 - 6:30pm |
Okay people, maybe I'm just a bit too hypersensitive to being noticed lately, LOL! Is it just , or do any of you others think 'enough is enough' with the looks and gawks already?! :(
I appreciate being noticed and even admired at times just like anybody else, but MY o MY are there times when enough is enough! Crimeny!! Does anyone else around here have any problem with being undressed with someone else's eyes?, other than your S.O. that is?!
As if THAT wasn't bad enough, what about the gall of the gawker to actually try and strike up a conversation with you?, better yet, your S.O.?, EVEN WITH wearing your marriage announcement on that left hand?!
What gives? (I'm just venting, brush me off if you must, lol!)

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What I HATE is when they check out every inch of my body! I don't mind them taking a quick look at my face, but when they insist on looking down - and down! It's like they're sizing me up ready to try a pick-up line. Some guys make it SO obvious they're having a good look at my breasts and comparing them with others they've stared at. Then they look at my crotch (like they're expecting to see a dick?) and at how tight my jeans are around my a*s.
But THEN they look again. And again.
It's like they''re waiting for me to say "Yes, nice breasts aren't they?". I bet if I did say that they'd be so embarrassed, cos guys never realize how obvious they are.
Once I was driving to a party on a hot summer night, I had a low cut top on. I had to stop at a junction and a bus pulled up next to me. Well! I think I was examined by every guy on that bus! I just can't believe that every guy thinks I'm impressive enough to stare at. But of course they do it to EVERY girl, so it isn't even a personal compliment!
And we're supposed to love it!
(BTW, shouldn't this be on the 'pet peeves' board? I'm off there now!)
Han Parry
When I was 13 and all the boys at junior high stared at me I felt good about it. I'm blonde and blue eyed, and one boy told me a few years later "you know, Sian, you were the hottest thing those boys had ever seen - or will ever see!".
But since then I've discovered 2 things:
1. Boys stare at anyone under 30 with boobs.
2. It's not always very nice cos what they're doing is just treating you as an object that they hope will be immature and uncaring enough to drop her knickers.
So I've taken to being 'bolshy', as my girlfriends say, and talking back.
If a guy just stares and doesn't talk, I say something like "Don't they have girls where you come from?". That annoys the shy ones; if I get one who's persistent and says "not as beautiful as you!", I say "I'm not beautiful where I come from - I've got a penis".
That gets them embarrassed - a girl daring to mention the 'p' word in mixed company!
(Sorry for doing so here - but I hope none of us has one anyway!)
But, seriously, if they gawp, just say something back. They're unlikely to say anything nasty in return because they want to impress you anyway!
Sian E
Reminds me of the story of the woman who at aged 20 was upset to be whistled at every time she passed construction site and at 40 was even more upset when they didn't :-o
Now why did I always picture you being cute as a button, just to hear you beat your looks down, even though you have a great guy in your life now, ahem, after that steamy story of how you two first hooked up?! ;D
Sounds to me like you should listen to HIM talk about your looks instead of yourself. Hee heeee.........
C h a r a c t e r
above all else
Mr. Para
C H A R A C T E R
I HATE to be gawked at! It seems that the older I get, the more I get gawked at. I am just minding my own business. That is one of the reasons I switched my running routine to night time. During the day I was getting beeped at/yelled to/whisteled at and it is very distracting. I am not out there for their enjoyment! I even got someone in trouble at work. He had been bothering me for some time even thought he knew I had a boyfriend. He was making rude and obscene comments to me. He said "Hey, baby!" at me when he was walking with the HR manager at my company. She called me and said she thought I looked uncomfortable and said this is the workplace and not the club and asked if I wanted her to say something. I said yes and she did and now the guy hates me but I really don't give a crap! At least he didn't get fired!
Some men have to tact!
This is my first posting, but "Gawking" is something I feel concerned about. i am always unsure.
Guys think it is normal to gawp at me with expectant looks. They are waiting for a sign from me. That is normal 'courtship' in our society. But it means we have to be so careful not to make them think we a are 'easy'.
In Spain where I was brought up, it was worse. For the boys at school it seemed normal to make comments. I was always hearing "you lok tasty today" (in Spanish of course), or even from some of the ruder boys "My pene (dick) is excited for your body". (I'm not sure how best to translate that!), but then when I was back in Spain for a while working in a cafe there when I was 19, all the men just stared as if I was "Miss World" (I am not!!!).
When my bf came to meet me, they made comments like "the luckiest man in the world is here!". It was as if they had never seen a young woman before!
They thought it was pleasing to me, but of course they don't realize how boring it gets. And you never know if they will take it further. if you smile at any man, they immediately think they can continue looking and saying thigns to you.
Worse was if I had to go into the Men's Room there (if they had left a tap running or needed more tp - see I have got your abbreviations!), then of course I would knock and shout out "Mujer en los servicios" (Woman in the bathroom) before I went in, but of course they would LOVE to be in there so they could stare at me while doing soemthing I shouldn't see them anyway.
But now I am 27, and I STILL get guys looking as me as if I am a 'babe'. It is pathetic. Why can't they restrict their gawking to their gfs or to girls in clubs! When you go to a club (I still do!) you EXPECT attention, but not elsewhere.
IU agree with hanParry though. Looking at my face is OK I suppose, but lookign at my boobs, my buns, or my tunnel is NOT NOT NOT!
I hope I have said something that makes sense! Thank you for having this subject.
Paloma UH
But re me earlier contribution - I said I was bolshy.
WELL on Friday night after work I went into the car lot to retreive my prized VW Polo. There was a guy looking at it. When I appeared he decided to quit gawking at the car and gawk at me instead!
Now, he WAS ugly (I am very sorry if I shouldn't say that - but he WAS) - but he said to me "A nice car for a nice girl".
I thought Is that supposed to be a pickup line?
Does he REALLY think I'm about to fall into his arms?
(I had never seen this guy be4)
I don't know if any other girls reading this can relate to this - but
(1) I ignored him, started the car, and was obviously annoyed, cos it slipped forward. (Ut's a stickshift and I'd forgotten I'd left in in gear!) So I was embarrassed AND annoyed.
(2) Of course then he said something I couldn't hear. Probably "learn to drive!" or something like that!
(3) So I took the shift out, I started the car, and now had to reverse. Would the shift go into reverse? Would it he--!
(4) So - this guy was gawking, I was getting frustrated, enbarrassed and annoyed, and the gearshift was crunching. A nightmare?
Well, I got out and shouted "Go away!" at him. he was so surprised (so was I), that he did!
Afterwards I thought maybe I shouldn't have been so hard, but my girlfriends have ALL said I was right.
Has anyone else had really persistent guys like that causing them to get worked uo?
Ooooooooooooooooooh!!!!!!
Sian E
Calm down PARA!!!
I laugh to myself when I hear men complain that women are attention seekers, or attention whores, and then they're the first ones to gawk and whistle.
My personal opinion is it perpetuates our culture. Objectification. You could be giving attention to a nasty person. And besides, not everybody likes attention. Some even find it embarrassing. So embarrassing, that they have to try and down-play their looks by wearing an oversized coat or baggy pants to go to the store, to try and hide from all the attention. Not everybody wants others to stare at them.
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